30 Hilarious Father of the Bride Speech Jokes

Wedding speeches are a great way to let your family know how much you love and appreciate them, but humour is what really makes a speech. If you're a dad who's trying to plan a killer speech for your daughter, we highly recommend including some father of the bride speech jokes. 

There's a lot to consider when writing the perfect father of the bride speech, but we guarantee that including some funny lines will make all the difference. 

This guide has some excellent examples of father of the bride jokes for the speech, as well as tips and advice from an industry expert on how to choose your dad jokes and deliver them well. 

The 30 Best Father of the Bride Speech Jokes

1. Welcome everyone to my daughter’s wedding. No matter what papers she may have signed today, I’ll always be the most important man in her life.

2. Hello all, I’m [name]. I hope you know who I am, but if you don’t, well done for sneaking into such an expensive meal unnoticed.

3. I’ve prepared a hilarious wedding speech… but [mother of the bride] is making me read this one instead.

4. Although we love her very much, we definitely won’t miss listening to her sing in the shower every morning. Good luck [partner’s name]!

5. I’ve been told by [bride] not to have a drink before the speech, so I apologise if I seem in a rush to get to the end!

6. I want to truly enjoy the next five minutes, which are also in fact the only five minutes that [bride] couldn’t plan and has no control over!

7. [Bride] has always brightened up our lives – she never did remember to turn off any lights.

8. It’s been said that daughters marry a man similar to their father! [Mother of the bride] – why do you look so upset?!

9. Brevity is the soul of wit, as you’ll learn on page 10 of my speech.

10. To start off my speech, I’ll talk about something everyone in the room has in common – all of your cars have been stolen.

11. An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have; the older she gets the more interested he is in her – Agatha Christie.

12. Funny, intelligent, kind, and good-looking. My daughter definitely gets all of those traits from me.

13. Today is a really special day – you’re about to witness the first and last time anyone ever trusts me to make a speech.

14. A wedding anniversary is the celebration of love, trust, partnership, tolerance, and tenacity. The order varies for any given year – Paul Sweeney.

15. We love our daughter to bits and always hoped she’d marry someone as amazing as she is. Lucky for you [partner's name] she’s marrying you before she finds them.

16. Thank you all for coming, it wouldn’t be the same without you… it would be a lot cheaper though.

17. Love may be blind but marriage is a real eye-opener – Anonymous.

18. To my new son-in-law, I’ll give you a useful piece of advice, forget your wedding anniversary once and you’ll remember it for the rest of your life.

19. We’re all feeling very emotional about this big day – even the cake is in tiers.

20. I love being married, I do. It’s so great to find that one special person that you want to annoy for the rest of your life – Rita Rudner.

21. [Partner’s name], I have a top tip for you, my daughter won’t start an argument with you if you’re already cleaning.

22. [Partner’s name], if you remember that marriage is simply a union in which one person is always right and the other is you, you’ll be fine.

23. Giving my daughter away was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. We all know, I’m not a generous person.

24. They say marriage is like wine, it keeps getting better with age so long as you put a cork in it.

25. Just remember, [partner’s name], never laugh at a choice my daughter makes. You were one of them, after all!

26. Our daughter has always been kind and generous, as a child she would happily share the contents of her nappy with everyone she met.

27. Whenever you’re wrong, admit it. Whenever you’re right, shut up – Ogden Nash.

28. [Partner’s name], it’s a huge pleasure to welcome you into our family. Over the years, we’ve come to think of you as the son/daughter we never asked for.

29. I’m sure we can all agree how wonderful and tasteful this day has been. I’m sorry to have ended it all here with my speech.

30. My daughter has asked that I don’t share anything embarrassing. So, that’s my speech over, goodnight folks!

Expert Tips for Delivering Father of the Bride Speech Jokes

When it comes to choosing and delivering funny lines in your speech, industry expert and founder of Speechy, Heidi Ellert-McDermott has all the tips you need. Nail father of the bride jokes for a speech by following these guidelines. 

1. Introductory Speech Jokes

"All dads need to include humour in their speech, and ideally from the get-go," explains Heidi, "Don’t waste the first 45 seconds of a wedding speech with dull wedding-waffle and instead, try to get a laugh within the first 20 seconds. It will make everyone feel that they’re in safe hands.

"Whilst it’s tempting for dads to google wedding speech icebreakers, be careful as some are so well-worn and will elicit groans rather than genuine laughter. I always encourage dads to create their own original lines and it’s not as difficult as you’d imagine. Simply, say what you see."

To help anyone looking for father of the bride jokes for a speech, Heidi has given some examples of jokes which will feel natural and help you start the speech off in the best way: 

You could start by some self-deprecating humour (proven to be the most effective form of comedy when it comes to winning an audience over). 

Feel free to confess to some nerves and say something like:

• "I’d like to start by saying I have the public speaking skills of a wheelie bin. No one has ever asked me to give a speech before and so I apologise in advance. Sometimes nepotism backfires terribly."

For something more positive, try: 

• "Writing this speech has been both a joy and incredibly difficult. I’ve thoroughly enjoyed reminiscing, but fitting all of our funny stories and wonderful memories into a thousand words proved tricky. That’s why, for those who are interested, I’ll be giving the full four-hour PowerPoint presentation at the bar later."

If your daughter is marrying someone similar to you, why not pay homage to the similarities you share:

• "My daughter and I were always incredibly close, and that may be why she married a man/woman who is so similar to me, (pause), yes, me and (partner's name) share the ability to demolish a Greggs sausage roll in less than 20 seconds, and we share a lifelong devotion to the best football team in the world. So, we’re very similar when it comes to the things that matter in life."

Alternatively, you could use the wedding planning process and venue as the start to your joke: 

• "Welcome to [venue's name] everyone. I love this place, but before we booked it, I did suggest [another venue's name] - strange thing was, when we shared the guestlist with them, they said they had no availability … for a decade. (Best man’s name), I’m blaming you!"

2. Including Humour Throughout

Though starting a father of the bride speech with a joke is important, you don't want the laughs to stop there. Heidi explains: "A father needs to include humour throughout. Aim for a laugh (or, at least, a hearty smile) every 20 seconds, until the final minute of your speech when you can afford to be more sentimental.

"The easiest way to include humour is finding those funny anecdotes. You don’t need to worry about creating punchlines if you just have a funny story to tell. Lots of dads make the mistake that they need to tell the story of their daughter's life from start to finish and tick off all her various achievements through the years.

"The truth is that a few good anecdotes will give a better insight into her character as well as being more entertaining. So, ditch the dull stuff and make more time for humorous content. Who cares if your daughter excelled at the flute in primary school, or where your family used to go on holiday?

"Instead, tell us about the time she got lost as a seven year old and was only discovered an hour later when the police found her in the window of a shop pretending to be a mannequin. Those are the types of stories people will remember."

3. Ask for Tips & Ideas

You know the saying it takes a village, that applies to speech writing, too!

"I’d advise fathers to get the whole family together and brainstorm stories," says Heidi.

"Your daughter’s mother and siblings will always have extra content ideas to consider. Maybe her brother will reveal it was actually your ‘innocent’ daughter who first showed him how to top up the gin bottle with water? You get extra dad-points if you manage to surprise your daughter with your speech!  

"Try to pin down your daughter’s unique personality and characteristics – forgetful, loud, determined – and then hunt down the stories that show these qualities in action. Adjectives bring nothing to a speech, but great stories do!"

4. Father of the Bride Joke Alternatives

It's not just stories about your daughter that make for funny father of the bride jokes, but the day-to-day details too.

Heidi explains, "Another comedy technique to master here is observation, so look at your daughter today and see if you can spot what makes her different.

"What’s her guilty pleasures and quirky habits? Is she still incapable of going to dinner with someone and not stealing their food? Is it surprising that the Amazon delivery guy isn’t at the wedding, considering how well she now knows him? Point out the things that make her ‘her’ and you’ll win the audience over.

"I always advise fathers, if a line could be said by another dad in his speech, then it shouldn’t be in yours. Make all your lines, comedy or otherwise, specific and unique. They’re more meaningful that way.

"But if you’re really struggling to add humour to your speech, you could consider using marriage quotes. Quoting other people is much better than resorting to a generic gag you claim credit for, and there’s lots of funny marriage advice from comedians, authors, or even philosophers depending on what sort of tone you want."

5. How to Deliver Comedic Lines

As well as having the goods in terms of content, the way you deliver your father of the bride speech jokes matters too. 

"When it comes to delivering your speech, make sure you smile throughout. If you look like you’re enjoying it, others will too. Feel free to laugh at your own jokes (laughter is literally infectious) and leave pauses where you expect laughter (so people have time to get the joke!).

"Definitely don’t start talking over laughter before it has subsided and remember, you’ve worked hard for it and you don’t want your audience to miss a line of what you’re saying. Try to look at and engage the newlyweds throughout your speech, and feel free to invite a bit of interaction.

"Remember to look at your audience and use facial expressions throughout. A cheeky eyebrow raise or gesturing quotation marks can add just as much laughter as a great line can."

Hungry for more tips? This guide on how to give a good father of the bride speech will have you ready to perform in no time!