A Guide to Giving a Father of the Groom Speech
Are you a father of the groom who has been tasked with giving a speech? If so, here's a complete guide including what to say, and when to say it
When it comes to traditional wedding speeches, a father of the groom speech isn't one you tend to see on the line-up, but who says tradition should dictate who gets to make a speech? Certainly not us.
If you've been tasked with delivering a father of the groom speech, we've got you completely covered with our guide on what to include, what to avoid and ideas to inspire you.
The way you structure a father of the groom speech, and the things you include will ultimately depend on who else is delivering a speech, but whatever the situation, you're bound to feel more confident and inspired after reading our advice.
The Ultimate Guide to Making a Father of the Groom Speech
- Does a Father of the Groom Make a Speech?
- When is the Father of the Groom Speech?
- What to Include in a Father of the Groom Speech
- Ideas for your Father of the Groom Speech
Does a Father of the Groom Make a Speech?
Traditionally, the father of the groom doesn't give a speech at a wedding, but there are plenty of reasons why as the father of the groom, you might be asked to give a speech.
If it's an LGBTQ+ wedding and, for example, there are two grooms getting married, you and the other groom's father may be asked to do speeches, or share the responsibility and do one together. Alternatively, the parents on the other side may not feel confident or want to do a speech, in which case, you may be asked to do so instead.
Or, your son just really wants to hear from his dad on his wedding day.
Whatever the reason, if the groom wants his father to make a speech at his wedding, give tradition the boot and go for it.
When is the Father of the Groom Speech?
Traditionally the order of wedding speeches is father of the bride, groom and best man. If you’re already having all three of these at the wedding, then the father of the groom speech will slot between the father of the bride and groom’s speeches.
If it’s an LGBTQ+ wedding, it’s lovely for both dads to have the chance to speak. You’ll want to do a speech each at the start before moving on to the grooms and the best man/men (if you’re still sticking with that order).
If both dads are speaking, keep the speech a bit shorter. Around four to six minutes is the ideal length for a father of the groom speech.
What to Include in a Father of the Groom Speech
The main body of the father of the groom speech will be made up with funny anecdotes about your son and toasting the newlyweds.
As this is a less traditional speech, you need to keep in mind two things - who else is giving a speech (and what will they include) and not mirroring everything the best man says.
Traditionally, each speech has a purpose (be it welcoming guests, thanking those involved in wedding, toasting the couple) so adding in an extra one in has the potential to repeat someone else’s words.
However, don't let this influence you too much. When it comes to thanking people for coming and toasting to the happy couple, you can absolutely include these, but if there is a father of the bride speech as well, keep these parts brief as he will usually cover that. If there isn't, you can absolutely take these responsibilities on.
If there is another parent giving a speech, we'd recommend liaising with them beforehand to ensure you're not overlapping too much.
Here’s the basic structure of a father of the groom speech which you can adapt depending on who else is speaking:
- Thank the father of the bride (if there's one before you) and introduce yourself
- Thank guests again for coming briefly
- Talk about the groom and share anecdotes, memories and stories
- Talk about his partner, meeting them for the first time and how happy your son is
- Welcome his partner into the family and give them advice as a couple
- Raise a toast to the newlyweds
If there’s two fathers of the groom, the structure is almost the same – sharing anecdotes, getting to know their partner, welcoming them into the family. However, you’ll need to do the full welcoming and thanking of guests that would typically fall into the father of the bride speech. You may want to assign one of you to do all the thank yous or split it between your speeches.
Depending on how the wedding planning and finances have been divided, you may wish to offer your thanks to your son’s partner’s family for paying and arranging the day. You may simply just want to welcome them as your new extended family and joke about looking forward to sharing grandparent duties with them one day.
Ideas for your Father of the Groom Speech
If the groom has a best man who is doing a speech, they will be covering your son’s life from the time he met him, so you may want to focus more on childhood stories and family memories.
Some things to mention may be:
- His childhood: nicknames, school reports, memorable moments, unusual injuries, hobbies, what he wanted to be when he grew up.
- Your family: how he used to get on with his siblings, if he’s the first or last to marry, what his mum thinks of her little boy all grown up, did you ever imagine he’d marry.
- Marriage advice: any words of wisdom you can offer, favourite or funny quotes.
- The couple: how have you interacted with the couple, what happened when he first brought his new partner home, how he’s changed (for the better!) since meeting them, your wishes for their future.
- His friends: you may have known them as kids too so what’s it like to see them all grown up.
- Grandchildren: if they already have kids, definitely say how proud you are of them and the couple as parents and if they are planning them, say how excited you are to become grandparents.
If you’re still stumped on what to say, check out our example father of the groom speeches. They’ve all been submitted by real dads so you can use their speeches as inspiration or a template for your own.
And if you have a funny bone and want to get the guests laughing, these father of the bride jokes can all be tailored for a father of the groom speech.
