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100 Questions to Ask Your Girlfriend to Get to Know Her Better

From deep and thought-provoking questions about love to what you do that turns her on, these are the conversation starters that’ll bring you even closer

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Image of a woman cuddling her girlfriend from behind as they stand in the kitchen making tea.
Pexels/RDNE Stock Project

Image of a woman cuddling her girlfriend from behind as they stand in the kitchen making tea.
Pexels/RDNE Stock Project

Getting to know anyone on a deeper level can be difficult, but wanting to know more about a romantic partner definitely comes with its own list of worries. As humans, we crave emotional connection but our fast-paced lives can mean that communication in a relationship sometimes breaks down. That’s why it can be helpful to have a bank of questions to ask your girlfriend to inspire your next conversation.  

“Meaningful conversations foster intimacy and deepen emotional bonds,” agrees Rachel Vida MacLynn, relationship expert and CEO and founder of matchmaking agency Maclynn International. “By fostering a safe and transparent communication style, it becomes second nature for each person in the relationship to feel safe telling their partner anything without fear of judgement or abandonment.

“Serious conversations can also prepare couples to handle tough times with resilience and unity.”

But remember, it’s not a job interview. Respect your girlfriend’s boundaries and give her space if you feel she isn’t ready to answer your proposed question. “Perhaps offer to share first,” adds Rachel. “By opening up yourself, you can encourage your partner to do the same.

“Actively listen and show interest and engagement with what your girlfriend is saying.”

It’s also worth noting that fun and light-hearted questions are just as important as the deep ones: “It’s crucial to keep a sense of fun and excitement – especially in long-term relationships,” says Rachel.

“Light-hearted questions can help reduce stress and pressure, and playful ones will ease tension. They also help to balance the relationship, as a mixture of serious and light-hearted conversations keep a healthy dynamic.”

The Best Questions to Ask Your Girlfriend

There’s a good chance you probably know things like her favourite pizza topping, her go-to podcast and her coffee order, which is why we’ve pulled together some of our favourite, less-thought-about questions and subjects to talk about with your girlfriend.

From questions to ask your girlfriend about love to flirty and funny and deep and thoughtful conversation starters, keep this page saved for your next date night!

Fun & Flirty Questions to Ask Your Girlfriend

It doesn’t matter how long you’ve been together, there’s a good chance that one of the reasons you and your girlfriend are such a good match is because of your shared sense of humour. These questions are great for both keeping the spark alive as well as getting to know someone’s likes and dislikes.

“‘What’s the best gift you’ve ever received?’ is a great question to ask your girlfriend because it can be fun to reflect on while helping you to see what your partner finds most meaningful when it comes to things like gift-giving,” suggests Rachel. “Fun questions like these also allow your partner to dream out loud and can open up exciting conversations about your next holiday, for example.”

  • What’s the best gift you’ve ever received?
  • What’s your dream travel destination, and why?
  • If we won the lottery tomorrow, what’s the first thing you would do?
  • What’s something I do that gives you butterflies?
  • Is there a song that reminds you of me?
  • What’s your favourite season?
  • Who was your first celebrity crush?
  • What’s your guilty pleasure?
  • Do you think you could set a world record, if so, what would it be for?
  • What animal do you think most accurately matches your personality?
  • What animal do you think most accurately matches my personality?
  • What’s your go-karaoke song?
  • What makes you feel sexy?
  • What’s your favourite way to spend a Sunday?
  • What’s your favourite weird food combination?
  • Who would you want to play you in a film about your life?
  • If you had to go on a reality TV show, which would it be and why?
  • Do you prefer sweet or savoury?
  • Are you a morning person or a night owl?
  • What’s a hobby or skill you’d like to learn?
  • What’s your favourite compliment to receive?
  • Is there anything non-sexual I do that turns you on?
  • What song could you listen to forever?
  • Describe our first date in your own words
  • What was your first impression of me?

Deep Questions to Ask Your Girlfriend

Looking for thoughtful questions to ask your girlfriend over your next late night or long walk? “Asking serious questions such as those about her dreams and fears will help you to understand her aspirations and concerns while showing your willingness to be there for her,” says Rachel. “Deep questions can also uncover insecurities or desires for personal development, as well as helping you to learn about your partner’s emotional needs.”

Rachel also suggests that if you feel scared or uncomfortable asking such deep questions, then the best thing to do is just be honest: “Admit that you feel awkward!” she says. “It can help to break the ice.

“Choose a relaxed setting to talk in – ideally not a public space or somewhere with too many distractions. Car journeys can be good. It can help kill the time and by not looking directly at your partner, it can feel easier to talk to them about something more vulnerable or serious.”

  • What are your biggest dreams and how can I support you in achieving them?
  • What are your biggest fears, and how can I support you in overcoming them?
  • What does love mean to you?
  • When do you feel most loved in our relationship?
  • If you could change one thing about your life, what would it be and why?
  • What was your childhood like?
  • If you could give your younger self one piece of advice, what would it be?
  • Which three people in your life are you most grateful for?
  • What’s your biggest fear?
  • Why do you think people cheat?
  • Who are you closest to in your family?
  • Do you believe in second chances?
  • Where’s your happy place?
  • Are you fulfilled in your career?
  • Have you ever experienced grief?
  • What do you think your life will look like in 10 years’ time?
  • Are you competitive?
  • Do you ever think it’s OK to lie?
  • Have you ever taken a risk that’s paid off/not paid off?
  • What makes you feel safe?
  • Do you ever have any recurring dreams?
  • What’s your biggest insecurity?
  • Do you have any regrets?
  • If you could have a pause or rewind button on your life, which would you choose?
  • Is there a question you’ve always wanted to ask me?

Questions About Love to Ask Your Girlfriend

A man whispering into his girlfriend's ear. She is smiling.
Pexels/Smoke Weddings

Whether it’s to better understand your girlfriend’s feelings around love or to know more about what makes her tick when it comes to romance, these relationship-focused questions are a great way to spark both serious and playful conversations.

“Knowing what makes your girlfriend happy can help you continue nurturing the relationship in ways that feel authentic and natural,” explains Rachel. “This is a great opportunity to uncover your partner’s love language and preferences for affection and attention while also keeping things fun and playful.”

  • Is there anything I do that always makes you smile?
  • What little things make you feel most loved?
  • If we could have a themed/activity date night, what theme would you pick?
  • Do you believe in soulmates?
  • What lessons have you learned from past relationships?
  • Have you ever had your heart broken?
  • Have you ever broken someone else’s heart?
  • What do you think is the biggest strength in our relationship?
  • What do you think could be improved in our relationship?
  • Do you like showing affection in public?
  • What first attracted you to me?
  • In an ideal world, how often would you like to have sex?
  • How do you feel when we spend time apart?
  • Do you want children one day?
  • Is there a song that reminds you of me?
  • When do you think is the right time to say, ‘I love you’?
  • What are your relationship red flags?
  • What makes you feel most attractive?
  • What’s your love language, and do you like to show love in the same way?
  • Is there anything we haven’t tried in the bedroom that you would like to try together?
  • Would you like to get married one day?
  • What does a happy marriage look like for you?
  • Do you have a favourite love story?
  • What’s your favourite memory of us?
  • Do you prefer date nights out or date nights at home?

Juicy Questions to Ask Your Girlfriend

Juicy and thought-provoking questions such as these will help your girlfriend uncover her values and personal growth, giving insight into how she views life’s challenges and achievements.

“Questions about how they have changed and hope to change foster conversations about self-awareness, growth and aspirations, as well as showing your support for her journey” adds Rachel. These aren’t the kind of questions to ask over your morning brew or when you’re in a hurry though, so be sure to pick your moment!

  • What do you think is the most important lesson you’ve learned so far in life?
  • How do you think you’ve changed over the past few years?
  • What do you hope to change about yourself in the future?
  • If you could experience life from someone else’s perspective for a day, who would it be and why?
  • Do you believe in ghosts or spirits?
  • What three things do you think we have in common?
  • What three things do you think we don’t have in common?
  • What’s one day in your past that you’d love to live all over again and why?
  • What’s the happiest memory from your childhood?
  • How do you describe me to your friends?
  • Do you believe that everything happens for a reason?
  • What outfit makes you feel the most confident?
  • Would you like me to be more or less assertive in the bedroom?
  • Of the couples we know, whose relationship do you admire and why?
  • Would you rather be 20 for the rest of your life, or 40?
  • Name something you think is always worth spending money on
  • How would you describe falling in love?
  • How do you feel you cope with change?
  • What personal challenges have shaped you the most?
  • Do you ever worry about growing older?
  • If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?
  • Do you think we’re falling into any bad habits right now?
  • Which five people would you invite to your dream dinner party and why?
  • What’s the best piece of advice you’ve ever received?
  • What does success look like to you?

Want to spice things up with your love even further? Sending a sexy text is the perfect way to ignite a spark. Here are 30 sexting examples to inspire you

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