Speech by Aaron
Luckily enough I found your site. I didn't have the first clue about making a speech, well what say in it, and when I came across this site I was rescued. I read through about 7 or 8 speeches and some jokes and then edited the to fit the circumstances and the people. Saved, I was, as I had to do two speeches, one away where the couple got married and one back home at the reception on their return. My greatest thanks to your site.
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Speech Type: Best man
Speech Creator: Aaron
Speech Date: Jun 2001
INTRO
I would just like to thank everybody here today, who has travelled so far to participate
in and witness this momentous occasion in Cs and Ms relationship. You can
all agree that today has been a great success, both C and M look absolutely
stunning.
Also, thanks must go to B and S, the beautiful bridesmaids, who did a fabulous
job today getting M ready and all the way to the reception area on time.
I will be saving the main speech until we all return home to Ireland, at the Roadstone
Club reception, where I will hopefully be making an utter mockery of C and not
myself., plus revealing some inside accounts of his past embarasments, I can assure you,
there are plenty of them.
JOKES
I would, at this time, like to ask M and C, to participate in this speech now.
M, if I can ask you to place your ____ hand flat on the table . . .
and C, now if you could place your ____ hand directly on top of M's hand.
Now C, I hope that you are enjoying that,
because it's the last time you'll ever have the upper hand.
Before I make the toasts, I would like to pass on a few words of wisdom to the both of you:
Firstly To you M: If you love something, set it free, If it comes back, it was, and
always will be, yours. If it never returns, it was never yours to begin with. If it just
sits in your room, messes up your stuff, eats your food, uses the telephone, takes your money,
and never behaves as if you set it free in the first place, you either married it or gave birth
to it. And To C: The key to a long and happy marriage is to remember those three
little words; You're right dear!
Just remember M, Men are like a fine wine, they start out like grapes, and it is your
job to stamp on them in the dark, until they mature into something, that you would like to
have dinner with. On the other hand C, women are also like a fine wine. They will
start out fresh, fruity and intoxicating to the mind and then turn full-bodied with age,
until they go all sour and vinegary, eventually giving you a headache.
TOASTS
It is an honour, to be asked to be best man here today. I just hope neither of them has the
need for my services again in the future, because I'm not doing it, it's too much pressure.
Let me just say, that from my perspective, M, you couldn't be marrying a better man,
and C, you couldn't be marrying a better woman. I am so proud to have both of you as
relatives and friends, as I am sure everybody here is.
I would also like everyone to be upstanding for a toast to all those people who couldn't be
here today, to celebrate C and M's wedding; I'm sure they are giving the
blessings of the World to you both. To Absent Family and Friends…
And finally, to the bride and groom, I'd just like to congratulations on the termination of
your isolation, and may I express an appreciation of your determination, to end the desperation
and frustration, which has caused you so much consternation, in giving you the inspiration to
make a combination, to bring about an accumulation to the population.
May you live as long as you like, and have all you like, for as long as you live.
To C and M!!! The new Mr and Mrs O!!!!!
