Speech by Brian White

Speech Type: Best man
Speech Creator: Brian White
Speech Date:
Good evening everyone and thank you for coming to this special occasion, its lovely to see SO MANY FRIENDS and family here having a wonderful time
For those of you who don't know me, my name is Brian and I have the privilege of being Neil's best man and despite the nerves, I have really been looking forward to today, as after all the years I have known Neil he has finally admitted that I am in fact the &quotBest Man&quot.

At this point I would like to ask both Neil and Michelle to take part in my speech. Michelle will you please place your left/right hand on the table. Neil will you please place your left/right hand on top of Michelle's..…

Are you enjoying that?

I would like to ask you both to keep your hands in this position until the end of my speech and believe me Neil you will regret it if you don't.
I would just like to say how fantastic the bridesmaids Helen and Bronwyn look, only to be outshone by Michelle, who, as I am sure you will all agree, looks amazing. As for Neil, what can I say?? We did our best, but there wasn't a great deal to work with really!! I think you will all also agree that the Flower girls and Page Boy all look fantastic and have done an excellent job of helping to make today such a great occasion.

It's fair to say that being a best man can be a fairly nerve racking experience and there's one person here this evening feeling really nervous, apprehensive and queasy about what lies ahead. All I can say is don't worry, it's probably because you've just married Neil and I am sure it will pass!

Neil, Nelly or also known as Red was born on the 14th Dec 1979 in a hospital in Durban where he came prematurely …….so as I understand it, here is no change there! He shares his Birthday with Michael Owen who some of you may know is an English football striker who has exceptional hand eye co-ordination, brilliant ball skills, moves like a dancer and admired by millions of fans but sadly for Neil that's where the similarity ends

The first time I met Neil was in standard 6 in high school and I could never really get to know him because instead of trying to chase after girls with the rest of us, he was always off after sticks and balls and pursuing his first love, the golf course. But as time moved on many stories developed but as it is Neils wedding I don't think that its fair to tell you about the time when he:

went ”borrowing” other peoples motorbikes to go on a joyride around Hillcrest,

or the first time he went clubbing and was told by the locals to head for the playground in Sanlam center,

or of him being kicked out of summer camp in the US after thinking a bed with a sleeping kid was a toilet

or his first fight after finding a ”free” pack of beer that turned out that they were owned by an unforgiving 7 foot biker

or when Neil practically disserted his house digs because a dead rat was planted by his house mates in his room.

But throughout the years with Neil he has always been a pillar of strength but I really take my hat off to Neil for his dedication and drive as I know no-one else who is willing to sacrifice so much to achieve his goals. Neil is the kind of guy who once has made up his mind on something, then nothing will deter him, not even the offer of a golf game. So Michelle you really had no chance once Neil set his sights on you. If Neil applies the dedication and commitment to his marriage which I know he will, well then Michelle you are one lucky women.

I'm sure of all of you who where able to join the bulls party last weekend had a good time, but a couple of us guys have always had a bet that the first to get married would have to do a run through Hillcrest. So dually on Saturday night Neil totally objected to this and he almost got away with it, until he was MISTAKENLY left behind at Frankies in Hillcrest to go to Stokers. And to true form and to never let a bet down, Neil dressed up as a baby ended up walking along Old main road before getting his lift to Stokers so I would like to compliment him on this.
As best man I believe I should offer some wise words to the couple about their future relationship together. So I would just like to pass on the following:

——————

Neil

1. Firstly, set the ground rules and establish who's boss [pause] then do everything Michelle says. [pause]

2. Always remember to tell your wife those three important little words [pause] ‘You're right love’. [pause]

——————

Michelle

1. A husband is like a tiled floor [pause] lay it right first time and you can spend years walking all over it. [pause]

2. A happy marriage is a matter of give and take the husband gives and the
wife takes. [pause]

On a serious note, whilst it is impossible to summarize the last 15 years I have known Neil, I would like to say that over the years he has been the best supportive friend anyone could hope for and truly disserves outmost happiness which he's found in a loving partner like Michelle and just a few words of wisdom for both of you is that you must always retain your individuality as you both are special as you are, always respect each other and most importantly remain best friends.

Now, in case any of you are wondering why I asked Neil to place his hand on top of Michelle's, I will tell you now. Neil … as my final role as your Best Man, it has been with great pleasure that I have been able to give you the last five minutes in which you will ever have the upper hand over Michelle.

Anyway thanks for listening to my speech this evening……… THANKS FOR the few LAUGHs and most importantly, to you Michelle and Neil – May your love be modern enough to survive the times, but old enough to last forever.
Ladies and Gentlemen / Boys and Girls……It gives me immense pleasure to invite you all to be upstanding, raise your glasses and join me in a toast to the new Mr and Mrs Arde, Michelle and Neil – who were made for each other and the very very best for your future life together.