Speech by Charles Price

Speech Type: Best man
Speech Creator: Charles Price
Speech Date: 24/05/2014 13:40:45

Intro

On behalf of our Jagwinder and our Ann I want to thank you all for coming today many from far and wide 

To those on Padda's side I rely on my script writer and say:

SAT SRI AKAL

For those on Anne's side:

WAHAY MANN

ARE YA FEELIN CHAMPION?

Traditionally the role of the best man is to humiliate the groom but I am going to break with tradition today and let HIS sisters do that.

As you know we are all very proud of our Jags, Padda, PL or Jagwinder as you may know him – our boy is all grown up a top IT professional executive in charge of a team at a good firm – and so it is healthy sometimes to know where you came from or at least what he looked like with hair – or thats what his sisters told me……

Born in Wolves in 1972

This is Jaggy at age 3 ahhhhh! there is nothing like baby photos to win over a crowd. you can buy these online see me later…

I am told by his sisters that his favourite hobby was dressing up as girl and they helped him with his hobby…..

I know he has the legs for it.

He practices his favourite guilty pleasure less often  now but recently he was allowed to give it a go when he begged us to dress him up on his stag do like this.`!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! after a fight we reluctantly agreed but did tell urge to mend his ways once he gets married. 

‘It's great to see so many of the lads who went on the stag weekend here today. It's a shame that the rest of them couldn't get bail, though. We'll drink a toast to the Krakow Six later. And their lawyer tells me that they've got a strong case. As long as the horse makes a full recovery, apparently, the farmer will drop most of the charges.

Padda grew up happily in London as a little boy but one aspect his life has been full of disappointment, frustration and continual failure – you guessed he is a Liverpool  fan! poor bugger!

At 17 he moved to the high class area of fishponds in Bristol to begin his career in IT

I met Padda at that point with my brother – one evening his big sister dropped him off in the flat we rented he was a bit spotty with long hair and dr martins and a bag of terrible indie music noone had heard of before . However He soon discovered designer labels and grooming products and Within a year his spots cleared he dropped his geeky and soon became the heart throb we see before us today.

We had great fun that year and I remember one instance when it became clear that Padda had a great sense of humour.. We had a very grumpy scottish landlord called Alan who would turn up at the door if the rent was a day late..or he just fancied checking you had washed up .Padda knew this and one month decided to hold back his rent just a day or two to test Alans response times. Of course within hours of the rent deadline being passed Alan turned up at the door and asked where is padda in a stern tone. Of course he was discovered lying on the floor of his bedroom in an L shape behind the door.. from where he didnt move as if he always lay there at that time of the day and agreed to pay the rent.

Padda has always been understanding of his mates too – On a serious note Padda has always been  the best of friends and all of his mates will agree that he will do anything for them. An example shouts volumes:

Paul remember a couple of us went on a surf trip to Portugal and being young and care free we had only bought a single flight out there – it hadnt occurred to us that we had to buy a return. It also hadnt occurred to us that we should take a credit card in case the debit card didnt work abroad.

Who was the first person we called from Portugal  at 2 am it was Padda ,most people would have told us where to go but Padda simply laughed and paid for the return flight a classic response…..

But Paddas rise to become a top IT executive was always too predictable – he would be in his bedroom night and day on that PC I have never known anyone win championship manager so many times. 

Now I turn to Anne what a lassie!  top sports woman accomplished scientist I am sure you will agree how well suited they both are and how beautiful Ann looks today……

We know that they share the love of traveling to exotic places and that brings me to how padda proposed…..

Firstly on the plane to the romantic spot Anne found the engagement ring hidden in Padda's sock proving that however clever padda is he will never program a computer to hide anything from his wife.

Usually to propose it is traditional that the man would chose a quiet, intimate scene not many people around somewhere you will always remember just the 2 of you so where did padda go the most populous country in the world , china with literally a population of billions. Luckily for Padda On day 23rd day he plucked up his courage and when he pulled out his old sock the locals mistook it for a new westernised weapon a run for it and Padda was able to get down on one knee and propose the rest is history

Just a couple of tips for padda in Marriage

programming today is a race between sofware engineers striving to build better and better idiot proof programs

but you will never ever develop sofware sophisticated enough to give you a 5 minute warning which will warn you that your wife is on her way home and you had promised to do the cleaning.

Also bear in mind that there is noone statistically more likely to murder you than your wife so consider that before watching a full Liverpool match and then asking to watch match of the day straight afterwards.

All of his friends will say that they are proud to know him and it was always a certainty he would end up with a lovely lassie as he has.

 We wish them all of the very best on their honeymoon and for the rest of their lives please raise a glass to Padda and Ann.