Speech by Christopher

Speech Type: Best man
Speech Creator: Christopher
Speech Date: 28/09/2016 12:03:29

Good evening Ladies and Gentleman. First off I'd like to take the time to introduce myself for those of you that don't know me I'm Chris, some of you probably know me as Pacey. If you don't know me feel free to buy me a drink later.

I would like to take the opportunity to say the bridesmaids Rebecca and Elle look gorgeous and did a fantastic job. I actually overheard the girls having quite a heated argument earlier about who was going to get to dance with me first….… Ladies, one of you is going to have to do it! Be warned though I've got two left legs.

And Gemma, I can't imagine any bride has ever looked more beautiful than you do today. Dan.… I think the room will agree that you're punching above your weight.

I honestly was honoured Dan asked me to be his best man. Dan and I were very close growing up but unfortunately drifted part in later years, though we did keep bumping into each other in the most random of places I don't think we ever met sober. It was only by chance whilst I was living in London the ever professional Dan messaged me on LinkedIn to see if I wanted to meet up for a drink whilst he was down for a conference. I've been best man once before; that time I gave the wrong rings and rewrote my speech the night before after a bottle of whisky. So I'm hopefully I'm doing better this time.

Dan and I have been lifelong friends, we grew up on the same street and went to the same schools, spent our days outside playing kerbsy and trying to persuade people they had ghosts in their house by whispering stuff through their fireplace flue. Dan and I probably weren't considered amongst the smartest of Children. I remember once someone told us about bird berries and how they were poisonous so Dan and I decided to eat a dozen to see if anything happened to us. Thankfully it didn't, despite trying it a several more times for scientific accuracy. Somehow despite accolades like that we survived into our teenage years.

Dan didn't excel in his academic studies but I think we can all be proud of what he has achieved since his days of terrorising teachers and academic boards. He's managed to develop a successful career in an industry full of people with degrees, I'm sure he's worked hard and from everything I've heard from his colleagues he is really good at it. He also tells me on a regular basis how amazing he is at sales but I wouldn't buy anything off him. He now has an amazing family of his own. I wish nothing but the best for you mate in your personal and professional life for the future.

Most people never thought Dan was the settling down type and even more surprised after the years of makeup, long fringes and hanging around seedy saunas in Newcastle that they weren't invited to a civil ceremony. Just the other day Dan checked himself into hospital to avoid wedding planning. He seemed to come to his senses though and came home after realising he had to pay 5 pound to watch movies for 24 hours.

I tried to get some nice stories about Dan but unfortunately there doesn't seem to be any. Most of what I got consisted of getting kicked out of hotels, his not so spectacular driving skills (ask him about it later) or the words not suitable for his wedding day. After a spending a lot of time with him recently not much has changed he still can't handle his drink, still can't drive and I haven't got anything suitable or nice to say about him. I can safely say I've learnt a lot about Dan in the last few months but nothing that surprised me. One story I heard about Dan that made me laugh is that he apparently used to spend time hiding in bushes flashing lights at cars trying to make them think they'd been caught by speed cameras and one day flashed a police car.

I haven't known Gem that long. The first time I met her was when I came on holiday to Malta earlier this year when they were still living here. Gem is she one of the most genuine people I've ever met and I already consider her a very close friend. Dan mate you couldn't have found anyone better. She's also less maintenance than you and spends less time in the health and beauty section of boots.

These two have been the most amazing friends over the last few months and I'd do anything for them. Ladies and gentlemen, I for one couldn't be happier that Daniel and Gemma have found real love and happiness in each other and wish them many wonderful loving years together. Ladies and Gentlemen, please be upstanding and raise your glasses to the bride and groom, Mr & Mrs Morrison.