Speech by Dan Stevens

Speech Type: Best man
Speech Creator: Dan Stevens
Speech Date: 22/08/2011 11:07:54

Dearly beloved, we are gathered here ….  O beggar I must have picked up someone else's notes! For those who don't know me I am Danny “the best man”. I have been asked to prepare a few words for today. I will be keeping it short and sweet as that's all my attention span can handle. I would just like to say how beautiful the bridesmaids are looking today only out shone by Amy and as tradition states the groomsmen must not look smarter or more dashing than the groom himself, well 2 out of 3 isn't bad. Before I start demolishing John's character in front of his family, new and old.

As most of you know there is someone very special missing today, a woman who should be here for her sons wedding day. I don't know if I have any right to say this, but I'm sure I'm not wrong when I say that Edna would be proud of you today and every day since you were born. No matter how painful you were she always loved you, and I'm pretty sure she would have loved Aimee too.

I was honoured when John asked me to be best man. The only problem with being a best man at a wedding is you never get to prove it, but I was told if I did a good enough job I could be best man at John's next wedding.

Jonathan Victor Williamson was born on 26^th January 1990; I tried to match this with a large scale world event. I failed, all I found out was the nurses at the hospital know it as ‘monkey birth Friday.’ Looking at him now it's no stretch of the imagination to say that John was an ugly baby. In fact Edna said she only had morning sickness after he was born. So the time has finally come. I've known John for too many years. First memory I have of him was the night I caught him throwing grapes at the house. I tripped him up and his big sister had to run in and save his butt. Not much has changed in that respect, I still kick his butt but it's Aimee that has to come and save him now. We've not really had many adventures; we were never really very ambitious. Most of our time together was spent holed up in his bedroom making coke can pyramids, playing Playstation games with the occasional jaunt to the back garden if there was furniture or fire wood to be burned. John and I always had a ‘special relationship’ I remember Edna reiterating this to us one morning after she had snuck into John's bedroom. It was the morning after Jordan and I had slept round. An hour later she produced a Polaroid of John, Jordan and I spooning, shirtless, under the covers in a double bed. John found that photo shortly after and it hasn't seen the light of day since. I'm pretty sure he has it in a locked box under his bed for when Aimee's at work. I hope the bride and groom have a lovely time in Wales on their honeymoon, well I presume its Wales, John said he was going to Bangor for a week.

That's me done you will be pleased to hear; please let's raise a toast for the happy couple John and Aimee. May your wedding days be few and your anniversaries many. To the bride and groom!