Speech by Grant.Davidson

Speech Type: Best man
Speech Creator: Grant.Davidson
Speech Date: May2007
Well Ade, good to see you made the most of your speech, as now you're a married man that will definitely be the last time you will be allowed to speak for 5 minutes without interruption.

look at Jo

I hope you are all enjoying what has been a brilliant wedding celebration, unfortunately every silver lining has a cloud, so here I am.
I'm Grant, Ade's friend from university, and it is a great honour for me to be here today as Ade's Best man.

I'd like to start off by congratulating the happy couple Ade &amp Jo, anyone who has been lucky enough to spend time in their company, know what a great couple they are.

Part of my job today is to thank you Ade for your comments regarding the bridesmaids, I agree with you they have done a wonderful job today, and look fantastic. They are of course only outshone by Jo, who I think you'll all agree looks absolutely stunning.

As I mentioned it is a honour and a privilege to be Ade's best man, but with the role comes the unenviable task of writing a speech. Unaccustomed as I am to public speaking, I did what I felt was required, and borrowed a book from some other poor bloke who has Suffered the same fate!!!

On opening the book I read on the first page
“At the reception the best man should help to keep things running smoothly by Buying drinks and socialising!”

Well I'll have a chat with everyone but at ٢.50 a pint, I've brought my own hip flask, which with the best will in the world is only going to go round the top table. So I do appologise for that.

When researching Ade's early years, I enlisted the help of his friends. I decided to write an email asking for any funny anecdotes of his youth. To encourage a response I also offered a bottle of champagne for any good material used.

Out of 20 people I received 2 replies, one was just totally inappropriate and the other read:-

“I am currently out of the office until Wednesday, If your mail is urgent please contact Katie on 01582 638954.” So I did and unfortunately she had never heard of you Ade!!

So I tried, but I guess by default Craig the champagne is yours, I'll get this to you later, the size represents effort made!!!

I understand Ade was quite an active child enjoying most sports, football, fishing, cricket and were led to believe a bit of motorcross that he enjoyed with Billy Bragg!

He also assures me that he played football for his county! I can only think that they were bereft of talent that day, as I only played football with him once. He was so bad that he went to take a penalty and the keeper sent him the wrong way!!

There is one sport that eventually attracted the athleticism of Ade, and thats DARTS. He likes to boast that he once played at the mecca of darts the lakeside and reckons he was throwing and 3 dart average of 94, which aint bad! But what he fails to say is that he only threw 3 darts and fluked a triple 19, with one of them!! So to help him improve his game without him having to cheat and make up the rules like the last time we played I got him a little gift. A decent set of arrows.

Ade has always been a bit of an animal lover, especially those of an exotic nature. I recall the day he visited Stratford Butterfly Centre, whilst eating his lunch his eye strayed to an iguana who was minding his own business soaking up the sun. Ade quick as a flash threw his jacket over it, and legged it out of the front gates with said iguana under his arm. Terry the iguana became a permanent fixture to his bedroom curtain for a number of years.

Now we can all understand why Jo refused to go on an African safari for her honeymoon.

As I said I met Ade at university, I was young fresh faced, naive and wide eyed at the new challenges ahead. I then met Ade… 3 years later I left university in a euphoric alcohol induced haze, with very little memory of the interim years.

However I do remember Ade enjoyed student life, but also enjoyed life outside the student environment, he had various jobs ranging from a bin man to a chef. Having a chef I use the term loosely as a flat mate was a bonus for me, as my culinary skills were very limited. He introduced me to such exquisite delights as frozen lasagne, pizza and any other left overs from one of a variety of restaurants he worked in. However after we had both consumed copious amounts of alcohol, It was always me that ended up in the Kitchen, Ade always conceded that been drunk in charge of a frying pan enhanced my culinary skills, Gordon ramsay with added spirits!
Fortunately Ade's creative skills are not limited to the Kitchen but extend to his design work. I remember the evening when Ade returned to our flat raving about this fantastic original piece of design that he had created that day. My mind raced to such work like the Monroe prints, by Warhole, Michelangelo's Sistene chapel, Tracy Emins bed!! What was it..?
Well, it was the oddbins window display in Deansgate! Sadly this magnificent work of art has since been lost to the general public when the special offer on the wine ended. But in order to preserve Ade's creative genius and flare for design, for all posterity, I'd like to present him with a memento of one of his finest pieces of design.

Please note that viewings can be arranged strictly by appointment only as the smallest room in the house can only accommodate 1 person at a time.
Ade has always been a confident &amp outgoing person, who enjoys the challenge of different places &amp new experiences. Some of which have proved to be more unusual than others. Take for example the time we were in New York.

As many of you will know New York offers a whole range of exciting opportunities for the average tourist, and we did most of those, Central Park, Empire state Building, Statue of liberty etc..

Ade however went one stage further, guaranteeing an experience not listed in the tour guide! Whilst I was drawing some much needed money from the cash point, Ade befriended Arty, a rather strange looking hippy who he invited to join us for a drink. Arty not having any money on him, returned the compliment by inviting us to join him and his friends, back at his place! Little did we realise that involved home made hooch, dog ends and a trip to the local cardboard city somewhere in the subways of New York.

We graciously made our excuses and ran like hell!

Music has always been a passion for Ade, and at uni he introduced me to many artists I had never heard of before and I also witnessed his progression on the guitar. Thankfully Jo shares his enthusiasm for music, and loves to hear him play. They often sit there on an evening, Ade strumming away, and Jo loves to join in and cant wait to get his didgeridoo out, and give it a good blow.

Although Jo has already said that this wont be happening as often after the wedding as she feels it may be beginning to annoy the neighbours! Well I guess thats married life for you, mate.

They say you can tell a lot about a person by the company they keep. This has never been more evident than when I met his friends and family on the stag weekend.

I'd never met many of them before but they made me feel very welcome, and for Ade to choose me as best man in that company of friends is truly a special honour indeed.

Speaking of the Stag do, I think those that went will agree my organisation of the event ran like clockwork!!

Apart from the 2 muggins, 2 stolen phones, 1 missed flight and a black eye for the groom, absolutely flawless!!

A couple of thank you's from me, one to Lee, for his early recci and making sure we found the old town, and one for craig who was the interpreter! I think a special mention has to go to Terry, who I have to say after literally falling off the 1st hurdle came back with a vegence and was the last man standing, still drinking on Monday afternoon absolute legend!

Now its customary for the best man to give some words of wisdom to the newly weds on marriage. Me being single, I cant speak from experience so I went out looking for happily married couples that could offer some advice… I'm still looking.!!!

However I've drawn up my own.

1. Firstly, set the ground rules and establish who's the boss…… then do everything she says!

2. The best way to remember your anniversary, is to forget it once.

3. To help the course of true love run smooth,
never forget those three very important words you must say every day… your right JO!

4. And one for you Jo! Don't keep him in the dog house too long or he might give his bone to the woman next door!!

Joking aside, Ade has been a great friend to me and we've had some excellent times together, and I'm sure we'll have more in the future. And its been an honour and a privilege to be best man today, and I couldn't wish for a better friend to be best man for.

When he told me he had asked Jo to marry him I was obviously delighted, I wish them all the happiness in the world.

Now it gives me great pleasure, and relief to ask you all to stand and raise your glasses, to the new Mr &amp Mrs Williams

Ade &amp Jo.