Speech by Kev Biscombe

Speech Type: Best man
Speech Creator: Kev Biscombe
Speech Date: sep 2003
Intro

Thank you Ken, for those kind words. Ken's main job today was to give away his daughter, between you and me it looked like he was running down the aisle with Helen in tow……!

Opening

I was a little nervous about standing up here and speaking, suffice to say this is not the first time today I've risen from a warm seat with a piece of paper in my hand.

While I was writing my speech I came across some interesting facts about what guests are thinking during a wedding speech.

23% of you are thinking about getting onto the dance floor and partying the night away.
18% of you are wondering what happened to me on my stag do. Moving swiftly on.
32% of the women are having romantic thoughts about the man sitting next to them!

Most couples on their wedding day describe it as the happiest day of their lives. That worries me because it implies that as from tomorrow there's a lifelong decline ahead, so I guess I'll have to make the most of today!

However, I must say that today has been so special, that even days less happy could still be blissful.

Thank you – Everybody

Firstly, we'd like to thank everyone for coming, and for the cards, presents and best wishes you have given us today.

Helen and I have been worrying about this day for weeks and it means a great deal to us that you managed to make it. We hope you are all having a great time

I know it's not the easiest thing to come all the way out to York but Helen and I really appreciate that you all made the effort. We're especially grateful to those people who have traveled from Leeds, Milnrow, and London to be here. My boss has come all the way from Southampton – It never ceases to amaze me how far he'll go for a free meal!

Thank you – Jan & Ken

I am really proud to have become Helen's husband and in the process become Ken and Jan's son in law.

I would like to thank them for the kindness that they have shown me and for welcoming me into their family as they have and being there for both Helen and I.

I also thank them for giving us their blessing; I hope I can live up to the honor.

Ken has very kindly arranged this evening's reception, and for this we thank him.

Here is a little something from us.

Thank you – Mum and Dad

I would also like to thank my parents, who really deserve a medal for endurance. They have always loved and supported me through every stage of my life, particularly through my Kevin the teenager stage that seemed to last well into my twenties, and which Helen may argue hasn't ended yet.

I promise that I will try and live the rest of my life with Helen by following your fine example.

I hope that they are proud and content parents today. Proud because Helen and I have gotten married and they know that she is not only beautiful, but a wonderful and caring person who I'm very much in love with. And content in the knowledge that I am finally someone else's responsibility!

So thanks mum and dad for all the love and guidance…..and especially the money.

I have a present for you here mum, as a thank you.

Thank you – Best Man

Simon was reluctant at first, saying that he was an old married man and that I should get someone younger. Well judging what he got up to during the stag weekend he organised, if that's old and married, then I'm glad I'm heading that way.

Knowing him so well, I know that he will be extremely nervous about his speech right now, but I've seen him make a fool of himself in front of a crowd lots of times before, so just imagine your in the pub Simon. But the kind of pub where you keep your trousers ON.

Simon is going to speak to you in a minute or two and I suspect he is about to become Yorkshire's first case of Foot IN Mouth

But joking aside, I have to say that I couldn't ask more of a best man, over the years he's been a shoulder to cry on, a house to stay at, of course a great drinking partner, and a true friend. He's so far helped the day run swimmingly, and I couldn't have asked more of a best man. I really am pleased that you agreed to be here in this role today.

We have, of course, got you a little present to say thank you, but I have to say I'm tempted to keep hold of it until I've heard your speech!

Ladies & Gentlemen a big round of applause for the best man, Simon Bellwood.

Thank you – Jack

I'd like to thank my son, Jack, for agreeing to be our usher. Does he not look handsome today? Actually he looks too handsome. It's an un-written rule at weddings no-one is allowed to look more handsome than the groom. That's why we invited all the lads on the back two tables – no such problems from them.

Jack, we have a little present for you.

Thank you – Helen

And now to my beautiful bride Helen. Tradition dictates that I tell a story or two about Helen now…Unfortunately Helen dictates that I do no such thing!

I am sure you will all agree how stunning my bride looks today. I can honestly say I was overwhelmed when I saw Helen for the first time today, and I would like everyone here to know how happy I feel that Helen agreed to be my wife.

She is beautiful, intelligent and charming.

She is a wonderful mother to our daughter, Emily, and a caring friend to my son, Jack.

She is my best friend, and despite knowing all that she does about me, still agreed to be my wife.

Ladies and gentlemen, a toast to my wife. To Helen

Thank you – Bridesmaids

A big thank you goes to our bridesmaids: Clare and our daughter, Emily. They are reserved till last because I am privileged to propose a toast to them after thanking them, as I do, for being Helen's bridesmaids.

I would like to say how lovely you both look and thank you for doing such a wonderful job today. Here is a little something from us.

Ladies and Gentlemen, to the bridesmaids.

Close

Before I finish, I would just like to wish a happy birthday to our friend Rob, and a happy belated birthday for yesterday to Auntie Mal – Happy Birthday!

Now I'm not going to stand here and give you a load of stale old jokes, I'm going to leave that to the best man.

But, I must say – isn't it funny how history repeats itself? 27 years ago Helen's mum and dad were putting her to bed with a dummy – and now it's happening all over again!