Speech by Patrick E

Speech Creator: Patrick E
Speech Date: 04/06/2018 15:38:06

Good afternoon ladies and gentleman, boys and girls. I hope everyone's enjoying this very special day so far. 

For those who don't know me, my name is Patrick and I'm the best man, and yes, James's thing for gingers also extends to men!

As you can see I'm a little nervous, but anxiety levels can be high for people when performing public speeches – however, anxiety will also be high when you've just married James! Get used to it, Amy, you're locked in now!

I would firstly like to thank James and Kev for their speeches, you have left me with a hard act to follow, so thanks for that!!

I would also like to thank James's friends Seb and Suzy who have travelled from America to be here for this day. You have come a long way to find out it is not an open bar! Hopefully the complimentary alcohol on the plane home will soften this blow!

Cheers to all the guys who made it to James's stag do in Amsterdam. All of you made it what it was and helped me to force James to wear his Princess Zelda dress! I realise I have set the bar between us on the stag and what comes around goes around but it was completely worth it.

But the biggest thanks goes out to James and Amy for including us all on this very special day. I know how much effort and preparation you have both put into today, to not only make it special for yourselves but all of us here. It was a beautiful ceremony, and this venue is brilliant.

Although me and James went to the same school, it wasn't until the end of school we became quite good friends. This was thanks to our love of music and playing guitar. We couldn't play guitar very well yet we formed a band with another 2 people here in the room and practiced in an old lady's garage. Unfortunately pretty soon a noise complaint petition had gone round the neighbourhood and the old lady sent us packing.

So how can I describe the guy who used to wear special driving shoes for the first year or so after he passed his test? Well I'll start by saying he is the only guy I know who took off his snowboard half way down a run, let go of it and lost it down the mountain! He will tell you about his love for retro video games, ‘90s hip hop and pop-punk, which are all reasons why we bonded. 

The truth is he lived his 20s when he was 16, he entered middle age by the time he was 21. Now he's in bed by 9pm and doesn't understand public transport. Amy is definitely already aware of this but she's married a grumpy old man who uses extremely good moisturiser.

At this point in my speech I would have liked to have told you about the stag weekend, but the law of the stag does not allow me to do this, however, getting me a drink or two at the bar later may help to loosen my vocal chords.

I just want to say how much of a great couple you make together, and how lucky you both are to have each other. Peter and Rosie, you must be so proud of James, that he has Amy in his life and everything they have accomplished so far. Kev and Gillie, you must be so proud of your beautiful daughter. Although it took Kev 7 years to admit he liked James, we are all glad you persevered!

Although I've been stressed every moment thinking about doing this speech since the day you asked me to be your best man, I cannot begin to tell you how proud I am to be here now for you on this day.

So ladies and gentleman can I ask you all to stand up. Raise a glass and go absolutely bananas for the bride and groom.