Speech by Paul Burrows

Speech Type: Best man
Speech Creator: Paul Burrows
Speech Date: Nov2005
Good afternoon Ladies and Gentlemen

For those of you that don't know me, my name's Paul, and up until a couple of years ago I worked many years with Chris at the Bank.

Well Chris, I hope you made the most of your speech, now you're a married man it's the last time you get to speak that long without interruption! – I should know – hi dear can I carry on.

First of all, on behalf of the bridesmaids, I'd like to thank Chris for his kind words.

I think everybody agrees that they look fantastic and have both done an excellent job. I'm sure they have certainly helped to make today very special.

I really have treated being the best man as an honour, but unfortunately it did mean that I had to do this speech.

And Chris it isn't going to be 45 minutes, I said 4 to 5.

Anyway, rest assured, unlike most traditional best man speeches, which are full of sexual innuendo, I've promised Chris and Angela that if there is anything a little risqué, I'll whip it out immediately..…

Now, I wasn't quite sure where to start, then someone suggested I have a quick look on the Internet….great idea

So..… I spent quite a few hours trawling the net, and I found some REALLY good stuff.…

but then I remembered I was supposed to be doing a wedding speechl!!!!!!!

By the way, if anyone is interested see me later… (show disk “other material”).

Anyway, I did actually find heaps of speeches on the Internet,

but unfortunately none of them were about a couple called Chris and Angela.

I must say at this point and I am sure you will all agree, that the bride, Angela, looks stunning today,

Chris, on the other hand..… just looks stunned

So, what can I tell you about the groom?

I've know him for about 10 years,
He's Handsome,
Intelligent,
Witty,
Charismatic.

Well that's what he told me to say.

As I said earlier, I worked with Chris at the Bank for many years but since then a lot of communication has been by email. In one of those – show email – Chris suggested I might like to talk about some of the good times at the Bank……………..…

Pause……Scratch head…………look puzzled

Ok lets leave that and move on.

Seriously though, we did have some good times.

There were some very close darts matches over lunch,

And I'm sure the customers must have wondered why those scrunched paper balls kept flying about – Chris was quite a good batsman with the poster tube!

One of the other activities we used to take part in was the 10 pin-bowling league. Month after month Chris organised this for us and would turn up and give us a good pasting

However, earlier this year January February time, we all turned up as usual, but amazingly after 2 of the 3 games I was winning!!!!

No. Not just winning – whooping him!!!!! I felt great. I was winning for once!!!

It was at this point that Chris announced he was seeing this wonderful girl and that he was madly in love and you all know the rest.

So it turns out I wasn't playing that good after all, it was just Chris was love struck and had other things on his mind.

And who can blame him.

It would be remiss of me not to mention the Boys Brigade, to whom Chris has given many years of dedication.

The Ushers today are all boys from the brigade and a good job they have done.

Now, during the ceremony I did notice one of them disappear for about 10 minutes, so afterwards I had a quite word to see if there was a problem.

He said he had felt a bit poorly, was ok now though as at the back of the church he had found a box labelled “FOR THE SICK”!!!!!

Seriously though, Chris has given a lot of time and effort to helping the Boys Brigade.

Chris has now finished the Brigade and I understand he has turned his attention to the Brownies!!!!!…………………………………….…

Helping take Lucy and Flora to and fro each week.

Finally, just before we got here I was given a couple of cards. I haven't opened them yet but thought it would be nice to read them out.

Card 1.

Dear Angela
Good luck on your wedding day, and hope you spend many happy years together. But I will always wonder what might have happened between us had things worked out differently.
Love ?????????

Card 2.

Dear Chris,
I hope your not going to forget us now your married, from all the girls at the Hot Spice sauna and Massage Parlour

Now it gives me immense pleasure, to invite you all to stand and raise your glasses in a toast to the happy couple,

We wish them well for the future and hope they enjoy a long and happy marriage.

Chris & Angela