Speech by Paul Geddes

Speech Type: Best man
Speech Creator: Paul Geddes
Speech Date: Dec2005
Good afternoon Ladies and Gentlemen, for those of you that don't know me, I'm Paul, and today I'm lucky enough to be the Best Man, although I don't feel very lucky at this precise moment.

It's a great honour to be Gav and Ali`s Best Man today. Albeit a very nerve wracking experience, I don`t mind admitting this is not the first time today I've stood up from and warm seat with a piece of paper in my hand.

FIRSTLY

On behalf of Fiona and Caitlin i`d like to thank Gav for his kind words. I can only agree they look fantastic and have done a great job looking after Alison today.

Alison has vetted my speech, …..well one of them at least. (throw away long list)

I will keep it short due to my throat. Alison has threatened to cut it if I go on too long.

I would also like to thank Alistair for his kind words. Alistair and Gav have actually got a lot in common today . As this is the 1st time that Alistair has been able to speak freely for five minutes without being interrupted, and Gav this is the last time you will be able to do the same.

Without further a do, I should say something about the Groom. Mr L.

Well unfortunately I never new Gav as a child, so I'm not best placed to fill you in on his childhood. But I did speak to his Dad about this, and he tells me that Gav was not always the handsome lad we see before us today. Oh no. In fact he was a bit of an ugly duckling as a child, his mum and dad used to tie a bone around his neck so the dog would play with him.

From an early age Gav showed great skill when it came to sport. Every year without fail he would take 1st prize at Auchenblae highland Games for the egg and spoon race, but never seamed to be much of a performer when it came to the sack race. Alison informs his performance in the sack hasn`t improved much since.

The name Gav originates from the French, meaning a courteous and loving individual, which I suppose you are. How ever the name Gavin means something totally different to me.

Firstly G is for Ghillie as Gav was a stalking ghillie at Mar Lodge when I first met him. After a year of so of misspent youth we both headed for Aberdeen, where we were flat mates for 4 years. The 1st year sharing a flat in Gt Northern Rd, that was short lived however. Maybe something to do with Gav arresting the neighbours for a Breach of the Piece.

Now A would have to be for Alison, and doesn't she look a million dollars today. I am delighted for you Gav. In Alison you've found an attractive, intelligent, loving and caring girl. Alison, well you've found Gav.

V , would have to be for Vociferous. For those of you who know Gav well, will be aware that he loves to talk. Never off the phone.

The lads on the stagger will vouch for that. Every 15 – 20 mins, Gav would disappear. On the phone declaring his loves to Alison and how much he was missing her.

Speaking of the Stag weekend. (Take sip of oasis) Although it was a quiet and conservative affair in Manchester we all had a great time, and all very well behaved too. Well except from one gentleman, ….he knows who he is! He decided to re-open the hotel bar on his own accord at 4 am, unknown to him the bar was alarmed, resulting in us all being sent to our beds in disgrace by the hotel staff.

That's not the worst of it though. He then managed to set off the fire alarm at 5 am, resulting in 250 or so poor guests having to evacuate the hotel, standing out in the cold in their pyjamas. Not to mention the poor Fire fighters that had to be dragged away from their busy work schedule.

Yes he knows who he is, but it wouldn't be fair of me to reveal his identity..… it may spoil his wedding day.

G. A .V .I, Now what would I stand for? Intelligent, Interesting? Intoxicated! Due to the love he shares with Malt whisky.

Although it does sometimes get the better of him. Like the night when I was tucked up in bed at 3 am 60 miles away in Braemar. The phone rang; I answered thinking oh my god what's happened? , who's calling me at this hour. Mr Lyndsay in a drunken stupor. He was having problems getting the car key to open the house door to our flat in Aberdeen.

Some how he managed to persuade me to get out of bed and drive to Aberdeen to rescue him. So off I set for Aberdeen. Upon my arrival I find Gav out for the count, on the door step cuddling a Chicken Kebab.

N, well I should say something Nice I guess. On a serious note though, Gav. is a nice guy. There is nothing I wouldn't do for him, and I know there's nothing he wouldn't do for me. In fact, we spend most of our time doing absolutely nothing for each other.

TELEGRAMS?

Without further ado, I would ask you all to join me and be upstanding and charge your glasses for a toast to the new Mr and Mrs *******, the bride and groom.