Speech by Richard Brownhill

Speech Type: Best man
Speech Creator: Richard Brownhill
Speech Date: 23/09/2012 11:19:36

Start

Thank you's

I would like to take this opportunity to say what a fantastic day it's been, a lovely ceremony and Leah, you look absolutely stunning. Gary, thank you for taking the day off work!  Congratulations to you both. It has been a very emotional day; even the cake is in tiers!

I would like to thank the chief bridesmaid Stacey and all the Bridesmaids for firstly performing their role so gracefully, and for looking fantastic throughout the day. I'd like to congratulate them for doing such a great job in making sure that Leah went against her better judgement and didn't change her mind.

Thanks also go to the Martin Pretty, who was our Usher today. I have never seen someone so skilfully point people to their seats. Pretty.… good job Martin.

Thanks should also go to Leah's parents Karen and Martin, and Gary's parents’ Karen and Pete for helping towards making today happen.

And on behalf of Gary and Leah I would like to say a thank you to everyone here today for coming and making it such a great day.

My first impressions of Leah was that she was a beautiful, witty, clever, friendly and thoughtful person and we can all see for ourselves how amazing Leah looks today. This proves one thing I've always known about Gary, that he definitely is a man of vision……often blurred and sometimes double, but nonetheless a man of vision lucky enough to have found such a beautiful wife. It goes to show how the phrase ‘for better or worse’ is so appropriate. Gary really couldn't have done any better while Leah really couldn't have done any worse.

Ripping

When Gary first asked me to be best man I immediately started to pap myself about this precise moment. But after I was physically sick at thought of doing a speech and put my stained underwear in the washing machine, I started to come round to the idea.

Having accepted the role, I'm pretty happy with the way things went today. From a best man's perspective, everything went smoothly. For starters, I got him to the venue on time, He also arrived sober, an achievement which shouldn't be underestimated with his track record… And most importantly in this time of economic uncertainty, I successfully resisted the urge to post the wedding rings to Cash for Gold and do a runner. Well done me…

Gary is equally impressed, he told me earlier I have done that good a job I have got the gig for his next wedding, which was nice of him…

Gary had a few people that were in the running to become his best man, so a nod must go out to my competitors, Andy Critchell and Kevin Bicknell. To be honest I can't think why Gary pick me over them. But I did some photo's that might explain Gary's Decision. (Open Envelope 1)

Gary and I first became friends when we worked together at Sainsburys. We both held the most respectable position in the company…we were both Trolley Boys.  This is where Gary's career peaked when he became known as the Grand Master Trolley Boy. For those of you who are not familiar with the Trolley boy profession, this means he was the loser who had been there the longest.

Now, Gary is known in Basingstoke for his muscular physique and has certainly not shied away from showing it off, when he is not wearing a spray on t-shirts or a tight revealing V neck, he has been known to swap outfits with girls on a night out. It was only last month that Gary was seen in Liverpool dressed up in his Minnie Mouse outfit. (Open Envelope 2)

We have stayed best of mate ever since and have shared some good times. But before I wrote this speech Leah did worn me not to talk about any story that could course offence, so my speech will come to an end shortly!

Soppy bit

But in all seriousness Gary may have the appearance of a Grizzly Bear (Jodie Marsh) but he has the heart of Disney's Pooh Bear. He is constantly putting others needs ahead of his own and has bundle of generosity to boot. I am truly privileged to be Gary's friend and honoured that he has picked me as his best man.

He is kind and caring guy who always has time for his friends. I am overjoyed that he has found himself a beautiful wife to share many happy moments with in the future to come.

Gary truly deserves everything he has earned I am could not be happier for him at this present moment.

End

So then, Ladies and gentlemen, it gives me immense pleasure, not to mention relief, to invite you all to stand…… I'd like you to raise your glasses in a toast to Gary and Leah, the new Mr and Mrs Trueman who we wish well for the future, and hope they enjoy a long and happy marriage.