Speech by Russ HP

Speech Type: Best man
Speech Creator: Russ HP
Speech Date: 11/08/2014 18:34:57

Hello.  For those of you that don't know me, my name is Russell and I am Roy's Best Man.

Now when Roy told me that he wanted me to be his Best Man my first reaction was that of abject fear at the thought of having to stand up and make a speech, as I am not one for public speaking.  However, out of all the people I spoke to, the best bit of advice that I got was, “Russ, a good speech is like a mini skirt, long enough to cover the essentials but short enough to keep their attention.”

I hope you are all enjoying what has so far been a brilliant day and that you are impressed as I am with how this unique reception perfectly demonstrates the personalities of both the Bride and Groom.  I'd like to thank every single one of you for making the trip here, especially those of you that knew that I'd be standing up and saying a few words – it's very touching that you still decided to come.

I'd also like make a special mention of the Bridesmaids Anna and Isobel.  Thank you supporting Elizabeth on her wedding day and for your contributions in the run up to today; you both look wonderful.  Indeed, you're outshone only by the Bride herself who is, as always, but more so than ever today, a picture of beauty.  And a final nod of appreciation to the flower girls Ophelia, Kara and Aimee who I think all looked absolutely adorable.

Now I've known Roy since I was 17 years old when we met at college in Accountancy class.  And after a kind invitation from Roy to join him in going bowling we quickly bonded over our mutual interests in alternative music, underage drinking and the fantastic value offered by the Wetherspoons beer and burger deal. 

Which leads me to the part of the speech where tradition dictates that I should use this opportunity to drag up stories from the Grooms past with the intention of embarrassing him and making him feel uncomfortable.  And if you're looking for that then I'm afraid you're going to be disappointed. Because the truth is, in all the years that I've stood side by side with Roy, through thick and thin, I've never seen anything other than a man of integrity, fearless originality and unquestionable loyalty to those he cares about. 

And because of that I'm certainly not going to mention:

–          The time he drunkenly spent half an hour on his hands and knees looking for a tooth that was still in his mouth

–          Or the time when we were trying to get into a train station very late at night and he decided that the only way was to risk serious injury by scaling a 12 foot high fence whilst the rest of us looked to our right, unlocked the gate and walked through.

–          Or indeed when we were in the Venue nightclub and he fell down a flight of stairs, popped straight up, declared he was okay, and then turned around and fell down the very next flight of stairs.

But moving on to a more serious note, since Roy's been with Elizabeth, she has only emphasised and added to his good qualities whilst complementing them with those of her own; it is no surprise to me that they have so many friends, that they often struggle to fit them all into their beautiful home.

Roy, we're fifteen years into our friendship, and it's been a laugh, and it's been a pleasure; speaking for three minutes straight without you interrupting me, but most of all it's been an absolute honour to stand up here as your Best Man.

To the both of you; having watched your relationship from its start and how it's strengthened with each year you've spent together, I find myself observing, on your wedding day, that it isn't that you've both found someone to be with; it's that you both found someone you simply cannot live without.  You were made for each other and I'm so very happy for you both.  You have my sincerest best wishes for your future together.

All that is left for me to say is to ask everybody here to raise your glasses and join me in toasting to the Bride and Groom.