Speech by steven honter

Speech Type: Best man
Speech Creator: steven honter
Speech Date: Sep2004
Hello everyone! Can you all hear me ok at the back? .… Well in that case can someone please get me a beer? For those who do not know me my name is Simon and I have known Tim for as long as I can remember: actually my memory is quite poor and only stretches back as far as last Wednesday; but I'm sure I've known him for longer that! I hope still to be friends at the end of this speech.

Firstly I would like to thank the chief brides maid Sharon and all the Brides Maids for firstly performing their role so gracefully, and for looking fantastic throughout the day. I'd also like to congratulate them for doing such a great job in making sure that Nikkei went against her better judgement and didn't change her mind. Thanks also go to the Ushers who have done a great job ushering people and to Pete our pageboy who's done a great job.

Thanks should also go to Nikkei's parents Sarah and Larry and Tims parents’ mark and fillipa for helping towards making today happen. And also on behalf of Tim and Nikkei I would like to say a thank you to everyone here today for turning up and making it such a great day. Tim, we have had some excellent times together and I know that we will continue to do so in the future. You have been a great friend to me over the years, and it is a great honour to be your best man thank you for the privilege.

I must say that I think Nikkei looks absolutely stunning
and as for Tim he just looks stunned! No Tim looks the part as well although he has copied my outfit…

Nikkei, I feel I need to tell you about the man whom you have married.
Tim can be described as Handsome, Witty, Intelligent, Generous, A great footballer and Per…Perfe…Sorry Tim, I'm having trouble reading your writing. Actually here is the real Tim (show picture). Nikkei what I will say is I know Tim has been counting the days looking forward to today and having the opportunity of making you his wife and the two of you becoming one and I know you have made him the happiest a man could be.

So let me tell you a bit about Tim .For those who don't know Tim's nickname is wiggy. He was christened this sometime ago partly because of some of the odd things that he's done and well lets say once he's armed with a hairbrush it's hard to get it off him. An example of Tim's creative behaviour was when he went to Chinese restaurant and tried to drink the contents of the finger bowl as he thought it was the soup honest. Another example was when we were on holiday together, coming on the catamaran? “ No gotta work on the old tan mate”, 3 hours later Tim asleep he looks like like a lobster and cant move for the next three days. But I must say I wouldn't want him to be any other way. Although that aloe Vera did cost me a few quid… I was also very lucky in finding one of Tim's old school reports for you all. Very briefly it reads, “Tim is an ideal pupil who excels in most subjects” oh I'm sorry I may have read that wrong. “Tim is an idle pupil who should be expelled from most subjects” sorry Tim.

Now, comes the time when I ask you if you could all join me in a toast to some very special people, without whom today just wouldn't be the same. I'm sure all of us at some point will pass by them and exchange a few kind words. Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like you to raise your glasses and say a toast……………..to the bar staff.

Ok ok , on a serious note..

On behalf of the bride and groom, I'd like to thank everyone here for sharing their special day, particularly those who have travelled long distances (thank you). And finally to the bride and groom, congratulations on the termination of your isolation and may I express an appreciation of your determination to end the desperation and frustration Which has caused you so much consternation in giving you the inspiration to make a combination to bring an accumulation to the population. May you live as long as you like, and have all you like for as long as you live? Ladies and Gentleman Tim and Nikkei!!! The new Mr and Mrs **************** ..