Speech by Stuart Beauchamp

Speech Type: Best man
Speech Creator: Stuart Beauchamp
Speech Date: 24/07/2013 09:16:52

Before I start I would just like to point out that Laura's really nervous about my speech. Surely this is the least of her worries, having just married a foreigner with webbed feet!

Anyway… Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen, I'm Stuart (aka Ruggy) and I am Tommi's best man. Although I don't like the term “Best Man” as it suggests Tommi has many men and I'm just his favourite….

I know many of you have travelled a long way to be here with Tommi and Laura on their special day and I know it means the world to them. Anyone here from Finland?   now bear with me…

Tera-ve, tu-lo-a, kai-kill-e, Su-o-mesta (welcome to all from Finland) Welcome to you all.

It is also great to see Tommi's mother, Aisla. I remember the first time I met Aisla, she came with photos of Tommi as a child. She found it highly amusing to point out his oversized head.

It has been an amazing day so far, the ceremony, the setting and the weather have all been beautiful.… and a special mention must go the bridesmaid… Anna, who Of Course looks fabulous.

The most common piece of advice I was given more than any other, was “don't forget to say how beautiful the bride looks”. Great advice, but it is not needed. Laura looks truly amazing today, so I think we should all raise a glass to the beautiful bride… Laura (glass up and pause and drink)

I have to say Tommi has scrubbed up quite well too… is that a new Primark suit mate?

As we all know, Tommi is from Finland, but he has been working and living in England now for many years. Not only is his grasp of English amazing but also his sense of humour and willingness to join in and have a good time. I often wondered why his English and humour were so good. Well let me tell you why… 

Growing up in Finland, Tommi used to watch re-runs of old English TV programmes. His favourites were Bergerac, Jeeves and Wooster.and his particular favourite.. Fawlty Towers. Watching Fawlty Towers, Tommi would often dream about one day moving to England and running his own hotel. His favourite character was not Basil Fawlty but actually.. Cybil. I believe this is where he first became fond of bossy English women!

Talking of bossy English girls, Tommi and I have a lot in common:

We both like a drink and a good time

We are both in a relationship with a Stevens girl, and..

We have both been on a night out and had to abandon our underwear (although on different nights)

I remember after one night out, Tommi and I were in my garden smoking a roll-up and having a chat about the girls, as you do. Tommi told me that one day he would marry Laura… shocked, I wondered whether he'd been on the absinthe again!

Chatting about the girls, Tommi said.. “I bloody love them girls but they are impossible to live with… they always have to be right” Of course I nodded in agreement, paused for thought and then replied… “I think they get it from their Mother”

Tommi had his stag do in May, in wait for it… ALICANTEEEE!

Thanks to all the lads who attended and made it so memorable. Luckily we all got back safe and sound, well just about… Swiss and Kenny had problems with the local gravity (pull a painful face)

After we got back, the hotel rang me saying “Mr. Tommi, he has left his outfit.” Clearly, I was a bit puzzled by this, until it arrived in the post… (get outfit out and pass to Tommi). Here you go mate, something for later maybe? I'm sure the lads will agree – you were a legend and a good sport (applause for Tommi)

Advice…

Tommi's team is Aston Villa (or West Brom depending on who he speaks to). They do say that a successful marriage can be compared to football, so my advice is:

Ensure you're fully committed every week

Try your best to score on Saturday

Make sure that you change ends at half time

Don't put your tackle in too hard as you might get injured (right Jim?)

And no tackling from behind!!

Laura and Tommi, I love you guys and you both have my best wishes for the future and your life together. I am sure you will both be very happy. On that note, I'd like you all to stand and raise your glasses to the beautiful bride and groom, Laura and Tommi (toast)

Now before my standing ovation, I would like to leave you all with a quote from Oscar Wilde, who once said… “The man who says his wife can't take a joke… forgets that she took him!”