Speech by Stuart Edlin

Speech Type: Best man
Speech Creator: Stuart Edlin
Speech Date: oct 2002
On behalf of Jo, the bridesmaid, I'd like to thank Sam for his kind words,
and I have to say she has done an excellent job not only today, but also
yesterday during the rehersal, and looks absolutely wonderful.

Good afternoon, Ladies and Gentlemen, for those that don't know me, my name
is Stuart Wouldyoulikeadrink. If you see me later on this evening, come up
and say hello, and please be sure to use my full name!..…

Well it's certainly great to be in this beautiful part of Wales, I've
been told that North Wales has a healthy rivalry with South Wales. Looking
myself I can't tell the difference, but I was assured by my Brother, a
Student of Theology, that the difference between the two, is that it has been
proved by historians and academics that Christ could never have been born in
South Wales…… There's irrefutable evidence because there have never been
3 Wise men there….… let alone a Virgin.

Talking of wise men, one once told me that a Best Mans speech should only
last as long as it takes the groom to make love……So, Ladies and
Gentlemen, thank you and good night!

(sit down)

I have known Sam for about 10 years now. We were introduced by Clive, and
ever since that moment, the friendship has developed, through our mutual love
of Stella (Artois), into becoming the best of mates. It was therefore, after
only a minor hesitation, that I accepted the honour of this role today. I
hesitated because being asked to be a Best Man is a bit like being selected
to sleep with Princess Anne, it's a tremendous honour, but no-one in there
right mind would choose to do it..…

Of course none of us would be here today if it wasn't for Giles introducing
Emma to Sam, and Giles would not have met Emma that night in PooNahNah if she
hadn't been with her friend Becky. Simon (drinking with Giles that night)
spotted Becky because of her skimpy dress and large chest so invited them
both back to their house for a late night session…… of pool. Sadly Becky
can't be here today, and nor can her dress.

It's great to see that Emma has made such a wonderful recovery from her
illness. However, some of you are probably unaware that she suffers from a
small but unharmful side effect from the Chemotherapy treatment..… the side
effect being a loss of her sense of smell…… Sam tells me he takes great
delight in this, because he can now break wind under the duvet to his heart's
content.

Sam has enjoyed a very colourful life…… Educated at Wellingborough and
Christ Church College, (that's Christ Church, Canterbury not Oxford). And
allegedly an accomplished sportsman, Captain of the school Rugby and Cricket
teams I'm told…… Sam once invited my brother to play for his Cricket
team, the Son's of Bacchus.… Will tells me he had little trouble getting to
know the lads in the side..… There was Sam and his brothers Ben and Dom of
course, the others introduced themselves on the field of play..… Hi, I'm
Charlie, me too Charlie also, and me, Charlie, nice to meet you.… 7
Charlies in total..… All Super Chaps.

After hearing of this great team that Sam played in, I had no hesitation in
giving him a call when my own side, Putney, were short one Sunday afternoon.
Sam was a legend, breaking club and league records in just one day..… for
the total number of balls bowled in one over, 13. I think he was aiming for
me on the boundary rather than the batsman's stumps.

At work Sam started from humble beginnings in the Sky Sports library, however
his career in Television has gone from strength to strength, and has taken
him all over the globe producing and directing programmes on the sports that
he loves. Although now an accomplished director, he is the first person to
help out when someone is keen to get a foot in the door of the industry, and
more importantly, he's been able to get me in to sold out games at Stamford
Bridge for free.

A great mind like Sam's doesn't come along very often – I'll never forget
these words Sam said to Clive and I when we were all sharing a flat in Fulham
nearly 8 years ago……… “Boys – Lets get completely pissed, go to Crazy
Larry's for a dance and some more booze, and then get a kebab’……… pure
genius.

Now for some Bestman's advice for Sam:-

Your Wedding Anniversary. A sure way always to remember it, is to
forget it just once.

And for the tough times remember this small simple sentence….…
"You're right dear"

Well, you'll be pleased to know that this speech is drawing to a close, but
before I finish, I would like to read out a some messages from those who
couldn't make it today.

The first is from David and Rhona Smith who are expecting their 1st child
today..… "So sad we can't be with you to celebrate today, lots of love and
luck, Dave and Rhona".

The next is from my friends at Putney Cricket Club: "We've found Sam to be
useless in every position. Hope Emma has more luck."

Sam you are an excellent friend to a great number of people, and it has truly
been an honour being your Bestman. Emma is a lovely person, she deserves a
good husband , and I believe she has found one.

On behalf of the Bride and Groom I would like to thank everyone here for
sharing their day, particularly those of you who have travelled long
distances.

But now it gives me immense pleasure, not to mention great relief, to invite
you all to stand and raise your glasses in a toast to the Bride and Groom,
Sam and Emma, Mr and Mrs Leadsom no less.

We wish them well for the future and hope they enjoy a long and happy
marriage..… Ladies and Gentlemen, Sam and Emma