Speech by Vincent Fung

Speech Type: Best man
Speech Creator: Vincent Fung
Speech Date: Jul2005
Good evening! Enjoying the evening so far? Wasn't that dinner great?

I'm going to do things a little backwards here… Before I begin, lets all have a toast for T—- and C—-. I want to get this out of the way now because T—- may not want to have a toast with me once I am done.

I've known T—- for a long time and he has asked me to talk today about what a great guy he is. Well, what I can say is that he is handsome, brilliant, funny and perrrf.… &ltTurn to Groom&gt … Hey T—- can you come here for a sec? I can't read your writing. What's this last word?
Actually, what happened is that a few weeks ago, I was out for a drink with T—- and C—-. As the subject of their wedding came up, C—- said to me… “Guess what?? We've decided that you are going to be our guest of honor!”

I was a little surprised so I asked… “Guest of what???”

Again, she says “Guest of honor!”

So I say “Ok so what exactly does this Guest of Honor have to do?”

She says “You get to give a speech.”

I really suck at giving speeches… so I said to them “Are you serious…? You want ME to give a speech??”

So that is the reason why I'm up here on the microphone on this very special day.

They explained to me that I was somehow responsible for them being together and the occurrence of this event today…

For those of you who don't know me, I'm Vince. I first met T—- 14 years ago at university when we were taking classes together in Engineering.

So what can I say about T—-?

Let me start by telling you who T—- was. T—- was the guy that convinced me… well actually he DRAGGED me and many others to constantly play pool with him at the Campus Cove at the university.
I remember the hours we spent, the whole group of us there in MacHall… shooting pool, hanging out, admiring the chicks walking by, pretending to study … and on the very rare occasion… actually studying… usually cramming for an exam that we had to write within the next hour.

In reality though, back then nobody knew who T—- was. But I'm sure all of you will remember Kermit.
Kermit and I went through a lot together. We did the car stereo thing, home audio, racing cars, snowboarding, badminton, golf, Mexico. We even had a little stint making wine. We wasted a LOT of time together!

But I can honestly say that without T—-, I probably would have never survived the first two years in Engineering. He somehow had all the connections. He knew how to get us the roadmaps, the notes and the past exams for all the classes we skipped together.

I don't think much has changed these days. I'm sure most of you have experienced trying to contact him during weekdays. We never ever have a problem getting hold of him. He replies to email instantly while he is at work and is only mildly annoyed that we have interrupted his surfing the web for helicopter tours and golf courses.
I think thats enough about Kermit… lets talk a bit about C—-.

I got to know C—- at the dance studio where I used to dance. I remember the very first time I saw her, she stood out… it was not only because she was very attractive… but because she was well below the average age of the other dancers there… which may have been in the neighborhood of about seventy years. I danced with her a few times as I do with most of the new guests at the dance studio and got to know her as she returned for lessons and social dances. Each and every time I saw her, I thought “she would the perfect match for T—-…” T—- had always had a thing for Taiwanese women.

So I went about scheming for a way to get them connected. It took a few tries… I tried talking T—- into learning ballroom dancing, but he was just not interested. I jumped at the opportunity when a group of us younger dancers at the dance studio planned to go on an outdoor skating trip. I called up T—- and convinced him to come along. The two of them hit it off immediately.

Poor C—- had such a hard time skating that night. I think it may have been her first time ever on ice skates. And our friend T—- here… er… I mean Kermit became a professional skating instructor that night.

After that night, T—- developed a sudden interest in ballroom dancing and managed to somehow always show up at the dance studio at the right times to run into C—-. He even bought two pairs of dance shoes to make it look like he was really serious about dancing. Unfortunately, this interest faded rather quickly as soon as C—- took the bait.

I remember one night… it was about a month after T—- and C—- had met and spent a bit of time together, C—- invited me out for a drink. Over a drink at the ever so elegant surroundings of an old greasy diner, she confided in me that she was not really interested in T—-. She asked me to break the news to him that he was a really great guy but at this time she wasn't interested in him and didn't want to hurt his feelings. I remember this night well. This was also the night that C—- told me the line… a line that I have used since on numerous occasions: “I'd rather be single and miserable, than married and wish I were dead.”

After that conversation with C—-, as a good friend to both of them, I knew exactly what had to be done.
So the next time I met up with T—-, I had to break the news to him, so I told him: “Yeah T—-… she likes you a lot! She's totally hot for you!”

Well… that line about how she would rather be single than married… I think C—- has changed her mind on that… and obviously her feelings for T—- have changed since that evening as well. Looks like Kermit has turned into C—-‘s prince charming…

So, as you can clearly see, I am not responsible for them being together on this special day. Their paths were just meant to cross and it is C—- that had the magic kiss…

Let us all witness that special kiss…