Speech by Andrew Fretter

Speech Type: Father of the bride/groom
Speech Creator: Andrew Fretter
Speech Date: Aug 2008
Good Afternoon. For those of you who don't know me, I'm Andy, Sian's Dad. It's that time in the proceedings that I'm sure you've all been waiting for – the joy of the speeches!
Some of you will know that I can sometimes get carried away once I get a microphone in my hands. But don't worry, I'm not going to sing! However, it's my job to say some choice words about the bride, and – as most of you will know – there's lots to say. Nevertheless, as Henry VIII said to each of his wives in turn -&quot I””ll try not to keep you very long!&quot Infact I've promised Sian to keep it short – for me – definitely no more than an hour!
Firstly, thank you all for coming to help celebrate this very special day. I hope that you have all had a wonderful afternoon and that you will have a great evening.
Some of you have travelled long distances to be here, from Sheffield, Leicester, the West Midlands, London, Wales, and Rutland. Other than Gwen, and her daughter, Madison, who have travelled from the States, I believe, the other two who have travelled the furthest are our other two children, Jonathan and Rhiannon – who have flown in from their current homes in Bangkok and Turkey respectively. At least Sian has stayed relatively local – perhaps Jonathan and Rhiannon are trying to tell us something!
I'm delighted to formally welcome Brendan into the family, although, as far as we're concerned, he's been part of the family for a long time. As most of you will know, Sian and Bren have been going out for about 9 years. I remember the first time we met Bren. They were both still at Swansea, and Sian had told us she really hoped we would like him, as she thought he might be &amp quote ”the one” un-quote.
Bren was, he told us afterwards, petrified of meeting us. I realised then that he was a good judge of character – I've been scared of Angie most of the last 31 years!
Any way after 9 years and buying 3 homes together, we were beginning to wonder whether he would ever get around to proposing! But when he did, he did it in style – ”phoning us on Christmas morning to formally ask for Sian's hand in marriage. I thought I'd better say yes quickly before he changed his mind.
I then asked him what Sian's reaction had been and he told me he hadn't yet asked her. Infact, he was a bit concerned what her answer might be. I knew of course that she had been waiting about 8 years and wasn't going to bottle it at the critical moment!
The actual proposal took place at Bren's favourite spot at Whitsand Bay, justdown the road, but Sian was panicking about the Christmas Dinner with Bren's family, and was moaning all the way across the beach – so much so, that Brendan very nearly did change his mind.
It goes without saying, Bren, I am delighted you didn't!
And I know that Sian cried for the next hour non stop – but I can assure you, Bren, they were tears of happiness.
Today, I must admit that I am the proudest dad in the world. I think that you will all agree that Sian looks absolutely stunning.
But she hasn't always looked so good. I remember when she was crawling on the floor, constantly throwing up and breaking wind – but that's enough about her 18 birthday party! I'm sure most of you know, Sian still likes a drink.. or two or three or 10.- But today she's promised me she won't get drunk – at least until after the speeches!
I am as happy today as the day she was born. I vividly remember, the moment the nurses laid her out on Angie's tummy, and she stared up at us for the first time. I knew at that moment what was meant by complete unconditional love – something that was, of course, repeated when Jonathan and Rhiannon were born.
Sian has always brightened up our lives – usually by leaving the lights on throughout the house!
However, no one is perfect – not even my daughter. I'm sure many of you will know that Sian is somewhat untidy at times – and tends to lose little things, like mobile phones and her purse, full of money and her debit and credit cards, every few months.
Despite these small blemishes on her character, she is a wonderful, thoughtful and caring daughter – and we are delighted that she has found someone else to tidy up after her.
We knew very early on in their relationship that Sian had met her Mr. Right in Brendan. This was certainly tested to the limit when, shortly after graduating Sian went around the world for 10 months with another man – Harry – who is here today. Obviousl they were just good friends.
and to test their relationship further, shortly after Sian returned to the UK, Brendan got his own back by going surfing around the world for 6 months with his mates.
But none of this seemed to dent their relationship at all and it was obvious after tha that they were destined to be together.
Of course, marriage isn't just about finding the perfect partner, but also about being one. Sian has made such a success of her life and career so far, that I'm sure her marriage to Bren will be just as successful.
Today, I look at my daughter and I see a beautiful, clever, independent, and sometimes very strong minded young woman… She obviously gets at least 3 out of these 4 characteristics from her mother! You can decide which 3!
Sian hasn't always welcomed my advice, but, Brendan, I thought I should use this opportunity to offer a few words of wisdom based on almost 31 years of mostly happy married life…
It seems to be a widely held belief, by so called experts, that a man is not complete until he has taken a wife – after he is married he is completely finished!
Another quotation I found said that marriage is a 50/50 partnership – I couldn't find out who made this statement – but whoever it was – they knew little about marriage – even less about mathematics – and nothing at all about women!
However, Brendan, you must remember that there is no challenge in a marriage that can't be overcome by one or more of the following: …
I was wrong! …..You were right! ……….Yes Dear. .No, your bum doesn't look big in that!…OK.. buy it!
And if it that all fails.. I love you! …
As a great philosopher once said, &amp quote ”A man who gives in when he is wrong, is a wise man, while a man who gives in when he is right .. is still married!”
Brendan you should also remember that women like silent men – they think you're listening! I've got away with it for years.
As many of you will know I play golf, and a recent study has shown that, on average, golfers live 5 years longer than non golfers. However, in a recent study carried out to establish whether married men live longer than bachelors, they found that actually there is no difference. . It just seems longer when you're married!
I would just like to leave you all with this thought.

The great Welsh actor Richard Burton once said that ”a woman accepts a man for what he is.. and then spends the rest of her life trying to change him.” . So, . if we can all take one last look at Brendan as we know him, . because Sian's remodelling work starts first thing in the morning!

Seriously though – committing yourself to another person for the rest of your life is a wonderful if worrying thing. With it comes the foundation for a happy family and a great life together. You will both need to compromise. There will undoubtedly be ups and downs – but overcoming those will make your love for each other even stronger. May you be as happy as Angie and I have been these last 31 years.
I wish you love and happiness, always.
Ladies &amp gentlemen please rise and raise your glasses.… to the bride and groom, the new Mr. &amp Mrs. Staniforth.