Speech by Caroline Hall

Speech Type: Father of the bride/groom
Speech Creator: Caroline Hall
Speech Date: aug2002

Intro’

I'd like to welcome you all on behalf of Denise and myself – and also from Mike and Elaine ( Matt's parents ) who have shared the cost of today's celebration.

Birth

When I sat down to start writing this speech – as I progress I'm sure you'll be more and more amazed that this involved any preparation at all – but trust me it did – I cast my mind back to 4:30 in the morning on Saturday April 1st 1978 – which is when Carolyn chose to arrive on the planet . An inauspicious start rescued by the Irish midwife who suggested I drank a few cans of Guinness whilst waiting for Carolyn to arrive. This combination of alcohol and a chatty, friendly companion seems to have coloured much of the 24 years since.

One of Carolyn's endearing qualities is her ability to drink a lot, talk even more ,( which she gets from her Mother ) and make friends which she keeps – there are people here she met when she was 8 years old , plus others from college, university and her year at Peugeot ( and there'll be more arriving this evening ) – this is a testament to Carolyn's ability to make friends and especially those always up for free food and drink !

Elephant Beer

Carolyn first got falling down drunk when she was 2 years old . We were living in Brixham at the time and she'd got in the habit of finishing off any dregs we left in our beer glasses ( thought it would stand her in good stead if she fell on hard times in the future ) . On this occasion Denise had poured herself a very strong Carlsberg Elephant beer which Joan and Mac ( Denise's parents ) had brought back from holiday – but then the phone rang and when she returned to the room ( only half an hour later after a short chat ) Carolyn was just finishing the Carlsberg . She then behaved like a caricature of a drunk – staggering around, bumping into furniture and falling on her back giggling – I'm sure there are lots of people here today who can vouch that this was the first of many occasions when she behaved like this .

Salford

Although the next few years included different houses and a range of schools and colleges it didn't seem very long before she was doing it again – this time at university in Salford – which is where she met Matt.

Kim her younger sister ( she's one of the quiet , retiring bridesmaids ) went to stay in Salford during Carolyn's first term – before she went she didn't want to go to university but after a weekend of drinking lager, eating pizza and playing pool she decided that an academic life was what she wanted after all . At this time Carolyn was still going out with someone called Neil ( anyone wanting to know more about him can ask that table over there ) – Kim's opinion was that Matt and Carolyn were an item ( denied ) and that Neil's days were numbered – just over 2 weeks later ( just after receiving a Man Utd away shirt as a present ) he was ditched and Kim's prediction proved to be right .

Engagement

Matt asked Carolyn to marry him after the graduation ball in Manchester – Denise and I happened to meet up with them in the hotel bar and it proved to be a double celebration as we were able to admire the ring and learn that Matt had lost our camera all within 2 minutes .

Matt

So what about Matt ?

Clearly Carolyn has not chosen to marry someone like her father – apart from the difference in height ( I'm actually wearing one of Matt's jackets ) – Matt is very practical good at DIY, he builds computers, fixes cars and of course installs hi-fi's – I do none of these .
However we're finding some common ground – Matt used to drink only Fosters Lager – I introduced him to wine – in particular Rioja ( which he took to like a duck to " whatever the sauce was " ) – he has developed a lovely way of accepting a drink – if you ask him would he like his red wine topped up he says " Oh – go on then " – somehow making it feel like he's doing you a favour .
We're moving closer together in other ways – he's loaned me his spare amplifier , I've bought £3k worth of speakers and I have a garage full of cable – anyone who knows Matt knows that wherever he is cable will accumulate .

Ghent

To celebrate the engagement we took Matt and Carolyn to Ghent for the weekend to drink Belgian beer and watch the world go by . The bar we frequented sold 48 different beers and it seemed a good idea to try as many as possible – Carolyn showed the true value of her business study degree by getting us all to rate each beer ( we tried 42) which she recorded and presented us with an Xcell spreadsheet and histograms when we returned . If you're interested a beer called Kwak won mainly on the basis that the glass is a small yard of ale in a wooden frame and you get the fun of seeing this wall of beer headed your way if you tip the glass too much . My personal favourite is one called Delerium Tremens which comes in a bottle with pink elephants on it and neatly brings us back to Carolyn's first brush with the excesses of alcohol .

Les and Angela

Just before we toast the bride and groom I'd like to mention our friends Les and Angela ( who actually introduced us to Ghent ) who are celebrating their 34th wedding anniversary today – which just goes to show that marriage keeps you young – as I know for a fact that Angela is only 43 because she told me on her last birthday .

Outro’

I'd now like to ask you to join me in toasting Matt and Carolyn the bride and groom with a toast I've pinched from Elaine -" may they be as happy as we thought we were going to be " .