Speech by Chris Rose

Speech Type: Father of the bride/groom
Speech Creator: Chris Rose
Speech Date: 31/03/2014 09:00:46

Family, friends, and long distance travellers and tiny ones

What a very special day it has been so far.  A lovely ceremony at our old Norman church at Westfield, fantastic violin playing by our own Garry Blakeley of Hastings, his ex band mate from many years ago, John Burgess, the Vicar, conducting the service, this spectacular setting at Powdermills (Many thanks to the staff here in advance and all they have done so far) 4 gorgeous bridesmaids doing a sterling job looking after Sarah and a stunningly beautiful bride, now a wife with her new husband . Perfect! Congratulations to you both.

On behalf of Vicki, myself, Dawn and David, can we welcome you all, so many close family and friends here together who have grown up with Sarah and Sam and helped shape them into the people they are today. We hope you are all having and will have a wonderful time today.

This is a special day not least of all because there are some here who have made an extraordinary effort to travel here and celebrate with all of us.

Please welcome on Sam's side

From Denver, Colorado: Zoe (Sam's sister),  Jake and Henry Izzard

From Toronto, Canada: Pat and Graham Jarvis

From New Zealand: Simon Wardale close friend of Sams

From Ireland: Emma and Derek, Sams cousins

On Sarah's side

From San francisco: Tenzin (Rose) Sarah's cousin, previous award winning leg spin bowler for Battle cricket club and current 49ers supporter and still a Liverpool fan!

From Hong Kong: Fidela (Gurka) long time special friend and lookalike of Sarah's

Unfortunately there are those who would have dearly liked to be with us and cherish this occasion.

Doreen and Joe from Chorley, Lancs, my Aunt, who could not be here through illness

Shirley Rose, Sarah's Step Grandma, from Bury, Lancs, who has just had a hip operation

Angela, my cousin, her husband Doug, children Lachie, Evie and Amber from Brisbain Australia, my cousin

And relatives who have left us but who have the best seats to look down at the whole thing

On Sarah's side….enjoy the affectionate nick names:

Grandad Greenhouse, Vicki's dad

Grandma Hastings, my mum

Grandad Fish, my dad

Linda, my sister

Roger (Jarvis), brother of David and uncle to Sam

Let us be upstanding and toast to absent friends

ABOUT SARAH

Sam, a very warm welcome into the family officially, although it seems you've been with us for some time now. Here we go, a little something about the Sarah past to surprise you or not surprise you. Sarah Linda Charlotte Rose, born at 8.23 on September 27, 1987, the year the BGs single “You win again” was no.1. Quite a coincidence I've since thought, but remember that one, Sam, you might want to use it sometime.  At 9lbs (SLIDE 1) exactly she was 2 weeks late but was still reluctant to make her way into the world. Well she cried so loudly and angrily at birth because basically she didn't want to be disturbed from her restful slumbers, (SLIDE 2) even the midwife muttered something  about her likely to be a very determined young lady. We're all nodding in agreement because that midwife turned out to be right. Sam already knows that when she puts her mind to sleeping in in the mornings, he's not going to persuade her otherwise.

 As she started to grow we recall many precious unforgettable moments. Fairly quickly she realised that girls have long hair, (SLIDE 3)  but she didn't. The only way to get male attention was to wear trendy headwear and that really worked…(SLIDE 4)didn't it Alex. But then there was a solution. She didn't need to impress cute blond kids with red hats (SLIDE 5) because she had this. For ages, 24 hours a day, she would wear pretend hair, DEMO, yes party tinsel hair and shake it so that she could feel the ends lap against her shoulders as she turned her head. She was a real girl then! Not only that, she twigged that women also DRESS TO IMPRESS(SLIDE 6). That led to.… (SLIDE 7/8)……..and then as many of you well know, in adulthood she developed an unhealthy interest in fancy dress parties as illustrated on your tables (SLIDE 9)She has always amused us with her own angle on life. For instance on the way to her childminder in Hastings, instead of nodding off or insisting the car didn't go louder (she didn't always use the right words though), we were amazed to be told how many clocks there are along  the seafront promenade. Are there any? Once, on a holiday ferry, when it was bedtime and the cabin lights were switched off, she was heard to say “Who turned my eyes off”. And wherever she went whether it was in the car on holiday in the middle of France, or even in the Church at Tom's Christening she moaned I wann dwink” You'd think, oh God…its a brave person who does not respond straight way to this so, for self preservation, there was always a spare bottle at the ready. I guess things haven't changed a great deal since then!

 We lived in Rye for the first years of the kids’ lives and thats where Sarah and Tom went to Primary school. Sarah had some really close friends there(SLIDE 10). But thanks to the Dept of Transport we left Rye found ourselves buying our house in Westfield.  With it came the inevitable change to secondary school. Leaving her friends in Rye was a really difficult step for her but typically, I think, Sarah Rose set about it bravely, and without fuss. She started Year 7 at Helenswood(SLIDE 11). Do you recognise those legs Sam? She soon adapted and made the best of her situation and quickly made plenty of new friends , some of them lifelong. Two special ones are here today: Fidela, one of our gorgeous bridesmaids(SLIDE 12) and Chantelle (SLIDE 13)now mother of two beautiful children(SLIDE 14/15). At school Fidela and Sarah seem to take very similar routes. Both enjoyed art and we always thought they would end up in those professions . They would sometimes get carried away with their creativity and produce bath art like this or even purple modelling like this(SLIDE 16/17)….I call it the experimental period. But then one day after a year at Hastings college studying art, it was all change, Sarah took a Law degree and Fidela studied Geography. It was a shock for us as Sarah had never even mentioned the word law in her life and I was dubious about how interesting she would find it. But she enjoyed it, got an excellent degree, studied for an LPC and is now training to be a solicitor and we wish her many years of fulfilment in that area. I think the midwife's instincts were correct, don't you. She is very determined and tenacious and works really hard when she puts her mind to things. And Sarah is someone with a huge amount of integrity. You know you can always trust her to do her best and be honest and trustworthy. She's highly intelligent and articulate (at least that's what Mr Armstrong, her English teacher told us), but exercises her natural skills sensitively. She's kind to others. And boy does she like to have a laugh. You can tell cant you.

HORSERIDING

Well, we have to mention what has become a huge part of her life. It didn't take too long before her female genetic programming got the better of her and she fell vulnerable to ….the gee gees. First there was the Bgs then there was the geegees. It wasn't a simple attraction though, which is probably the same for you Sam. Are horses ever simple though? Age 6, another little girl had started at Highfields stables, and when Sarah got a sniff of this, she thought “If she can do it, so can I” I have to say thats how we chalked up: dogs, cats, rabbits, guinea pigs, and even stick insects. Yes (SLIDE 18)thanks Ellen Jasper. If you had not taken up horse riding, and I might add then give it up, we would not be where we are today. For whatever Ellen did, Sarah had to follow suit. There was almost domestic Armageddon. If Ellen had the “My Little Pony” collection what would Sarah do? Quite! Get the “My Beautiful horses” collection. So, with OCD glaring eyes, she dived head first into the equine world of Rachel and Sophie North and a little bit of Sam North on the side. It wasn't easy for us. Our universe changed. The lounge and spare bedroom became a Jenger set stables and riding school. The guinea pig had to forfeit its straw to be hay for mucking out. (SLIDE 19) And little Tom's pool table was invaded and occupied Putin like. You get the picture. There was no way Sarah would allow us to ignore this obsession and after much nagging for a horse, we succumbed and the beautiful Bronte was bought for her 18th birthday (SLIDE 20). But throughout that time Vick and I discovered there was another side to all this…that there could be hidden benefits to this horseriding fetish….tidiness, organisation, routine, cleanliness, responsibility, maturity, peace and quiet on a Sunday. It all looked a bit brighter for us. And then it got bigger than that. There was the extended family of Highfield stables and more peace and quiet for us a Sunday, although we had to start providing the odd pool party for guests from the stables and half of Bexhill College. And so Sophie, Chloe and Hannah, three of the bridesmaids today(SLIDE 21/22) joined Fidela and Chantelle to become her best mates.

MEETING SARAH

So Sam. How did you get to meet Sarah. Disco? Pub? Stables? No way. No sooner had his parents moved from Little Ridge to Westfield lane, he couldn't help noticing this little beauty at No. 99. Before any of his friends could get a look in, there was, one day, a knock on the front door. That's slightly unusual at our house as most come to the back so I prepared myself for a stranger. And strange he was. I opened the door to find an embarrassed young man standing there. “Does a girl called Sarah live here?” Well, I deliberately looked bewildered but then chose my words carefully and thoughtfully . “AND”… I said. Could I give this envelop to her he stammered. Yes Leigh Allum, you also have a lot to answer for and by the way, I still have not forgiven you yet for turning up at 6 o'clock on a Sunday morning on your way home from a night out and sprawling yourself, anonymous, half cut, singing on the roof of Sams 4 by 4. I have to tell you the police were nearly called until Sam assured me you were a friend. Stay out of trouble tonight Leigh Did you get all your dietry reqirements btw Leigh?

And so the relationship developed. Sam used to come around regularly and then stay the odd night. One day, when I realised that he was returning home at 6.30 am, not 6.30 pm each day.

 it occurred to me that he had in fact moved in. Not only moved in but his cars moved in with him…the Vauxhall Vectra, the Warrior, The BMW…

And then came…THE WHITE VAN. (SLIDE 23)..imposing, voluptuous, 0 to 60 in 25 seconds. This was nobility on the road, so much so that BMWs and Mercedes stood aside in awe of it, at least they did on my driveway anyway. It was sheer jaw dropping inspiration to witness, ballet style, the skilful dance of carpenter and machine, as we watched the dented rear doors edge up the drive and this white charger come to rest in the celebrated 6 inch skid marks in the lawn. Those were spiritual days. I had never paid much attention to VW or Transit white vans before. They were just driven by those friendly chippies with 3 fingers amputated and loud voices complimenting me on my lack of parentage. So to have a special resting place in the drive for a Jarvis Carpentry white work van blocking the view of the garden was beyond compare. I've learnt quite a lot about the beauty of the VW Transporter since. Forget Shakespeare, Byron, Sam Calver, to know the poetry of the T5 is a rhythmical blend of 130hp, 2.5 litre, 6 speed manual, 295lbs of torque is awesome. Then, white world obscured by dark clouds of misery, one day they moved to Essenden Road. We were bereft. What's with all the space in the drive? No more white charger. No more mantras to the white charger. What were we to do? So Yes. We bought a blue 130 hp Lwb VW Transporter!

But in all seriousness, Sam and Sarah's time with us was good for them. They learnt a lot about each other, which is what you should do before tying the knot. Sam was incredibly supportive of Sarah during her learning and training years, and was determined she should achieve her ambitions. In the meantime he, as he always does, worked incredibly hard and it is a great credit to him that he has never been out of work as a self employed carpenter. That's because he is a perfectionist and has gained himself an enviable reputation in the world of wood. I admire Sam and his attributes. He is entirely his own man, self trained eager to learn, patient, and has ideas and direction.

I think he and Sarah make an excellent partnership as they are both heading in the same direction(SLIDE 24). So Sam, I'm glad to welcome you to our family officially, even though it seems like you've been with us for ages. Honestly Sam, I'm not saying this because I need an extension built or a shed erected in the garden, but because Sam…in retirement, I'd really like some decking built around the swimming pool..

ADVICE

This is now the moment I am supposed to give fatherly advice. Now actually, I'm not the preachy type and I honestly believe that there is not one script to follow on life's journey, we all find different routes to fulfilment. However, there does seem to be this constant theme that runs through marriage when I read the literature or talk to my mates. So I would say this to you Sam. Make sure you sit her down soon and let her know who's boss. Tell her to her face. firmly “You're the boss” because the old adage is definitely right: a man who gives in when he is wrong is a wise man. A man who gives in when he is right is married.

I'm going to read you a short poem to nearly end with called “One”. Nobody knows who wrote it!

When the one whose hand you're holding

Is the one one who holds your heart

When the one whose eyes you gaze into

Gives your hopes and dreams their start

When the one you think of first and last

Is the one who hold s you tight

And the things you plan together

Make the whole world seem just right

When the one whom you believe in

Puts their faith and trust in you

You've found the one and only love

You'll share your whole life through

TOAST

Bride and groom, new husband and wife, to Sarah and Sam