Speech by Dan Michel

Speech Type: Father of the bride/groom
Speech Creator: Dan Michel
Speech Date: 01/07/2015 22:31:38

Fore score, and seven years ago…That was for Brother Dave, who thought I wouldn't do it! If I understand things correctly, me and these pieces of paper are all that is standing between you all here from that buffet over there. So, exercising the better part of judgement, and personal safety, I'll keep this short.

Hello all. For those who do not know me, I'm Dan, Alyssa's dad, and this is my lovely wife, Lindsay. We would like to extend a very warm welcome to Frank and Judy and their family and to the relatives and friends of both families. But the biggest welcome Lindsay and I can extend today is to welcome James into our family.

Alyssa. To say how proud Mom and I are of you goes way beyond my rhetorical abilities. You are so grown up, so smart, loving, generous of spirit, and stunningly beautiful- thank God for Lindsay's genetics!

I remember the day Alyssa was born. Lindsay and I were building a shed. Lindsay was on the roof slinging her hammer when she stopped with a strange look on her face and said, “I think its happening”. Since she wasn't due for well over a month, I said,

“What's happening? You run out of nails?” A second look at her face and I knew exactly what was happening.

The first time I entered into the preemie ward, the nurse asked if I'd like to hold Alyssa. I looked at the nurse as if she must be insane. She laid the tiny bundle in my arms and I walked the ward, tears streaming down my face.

Later that week, while talking to one of Lindsay's best girlfriends,

(Anne Daley), she told me something that I've never forgotten.

She said,” How wonderful. A girl. You know daughters never stop loving their daddies” How true it is and how blessed I am.

So I thought. A girl! Awesome! She'll be my little tomboy, my buddy. she's gonna love hiking, camping, fishing, hunting, and mucking it up in the great outdoors! W-e-llllllllll, all of you who know Alyssa know that I was about 180 degrees off!

First time I took her fishing, she was horrified that a worm had to be sacrificed for the larger objective. So after consoling her tears we switched to dough balls. And on our first and last fishing adventure, we came home empty handed.

However, that was the first of many many times that I would see that her love and compassion for all god's creatures great and small was to be an indelible part of who she would become.

It was so long mud pies and hello princesses!

When I first met James he seemed like a good kid – polite,

well- mannered , you know, OK. I wasn't going to pay a lot of attention ’til I saw if this was going anywhere.

It was shortly thereafter I got a chance to know James a little better as we worked together designing a display piece for High Cotton.

I had the tools and carpentry skills, he had the vision. You learn a lot about a person when you collaborate on a project. It was fun talking and emailing ideas back and forth. I was very impressed by his focus and creativity.

But I have to say a small, but revealing insight into who James is, came when he and Alyssa were at our home in northern Virginia about to go on their first vacation together. . With only hours before their flight, he discovered his passport was still in Raleigh.

The clock was ticking and he was in a real pickle.

He took it on head first, accepting full responsibility and diving into crisis mode with calmness, determination, humility, and even humour.

No yelling, cursing, or searching to find blame outside of himself.

All would have been understandable given the predicament. A friend met him 1/2way with the document and the calamity was narrowly averted.

The next day after they'd left, it dawned on me. He isn't just a “good kid” – he is a fine young man, mature and revealing a solid character.

That sentiment has been re-enforced many times since then.

The father-of-the-bride speech is supposed to wind up with some sage advice for the new couple. What I see before me is a young man and a young woman who love each other deeply. I have observed how well they communicate.

You are blessed with an extraordinary support group of family, friends, and church. Both of you are already very accomplished in your careers. So yes, you enter your life together on a strong foundation. But never forget, you are a team and are each other's ultimate support.

I have no doubt that you will navigate your union with kindness, compassion, and respect that is anchored in your mutual love.

So I won't flatter myself to think that I possess insights that are wholly original – only ones that have worked for Lindsay and me.

Work hard to be a good listener.

Resist the impulse to formulate an instant response.

I like to think of it as a filter that slows one down enough to evaluate and digest what you're hearing, allowing for perspective.

We live in a noisy eclectic world of gadgets, multi-tasking, and instant communication demanding instant answers.

I say don't succumb to this with each other. Believe me; most of the important things are not solved instantly.

Slow down. You are a team. Enjoy the ride.

It goes faster than you think.

But most of all

Enjoy each other.

Oh, I almost forgot the final piece of advice I have was given to me by a very wise older gentleman, who enjoyed a long and happy marriage. He said, it's really quite simple, “compromise, do it her way”!! Thank, you!