Speech by David Crook

Speech Type: Father of the bride/groom
Speech Creator: David Crook
Speech Date: Aug2005
Ladies and Gentlemen, —- Family and Friends, —- Good Afternoon.

For those of you who don't know us, I'm David and seated here: wearing the ravishing pink outfit is my wife and Sallyanne's Mom, Margaret. We have been very happily married now for twenty six years, which isn't too bad out of thirty five years is it.

As it is my privilege to make the first speech I would like to start by saying that Margaret and I and Sue and Rob, Ian's parents, would sincerely like to welcome today, relatives and friends of both families to this very happy occasion.

Note: Only read the red if the weather is not so good)

I would like to thank you all for joining us here today to celebrate the marriage of Ian and Sallyanne, I would also like to thank the beautiful bridesmaids for looking after Sallyanne so well, the vicar for a lovely service, (I would have liked to have thanked) his boss for the great improvement in the weather (but unfortunately someone must have reneged on the collection today) and finally the staff at this wonderful Hotel for the great food and service.

We are so very proud today, to see Sallyanne looking so beautiful. We are also very proud, that she has married Ian, a very special young man who swept her off her feet, we didn't know quite what to expect of Ian, as Sallyanne had told us he had injured his leg in an accident and was undergoing physiotherapy, she was always a sucker for a wounded soul, you should see some of the stay animals she brought home, afterwards we found that Ian was simply in need of some aqua-therapy and used to go swimming at leisure pool, sometimes for hours and hours on end, as he knew Sallyanne worked there — and one of Sallyanne's duties was to check the water temperature in the pool on a regular basis, we've heard that it was the best kept pool in the leisure group.

So it was a great relief to us when we eventually met Ian, who has since brought so much joy and happiness not only to Sallyanne, but to all of our family, they made each other happy and seemed to be made for each other right from the start, even more so on the unplanned arrival of our grandson Archie, who has since brought so much Joy into all our lives and we hope will continue to do so for many years to come.

When Ian and Sallyanne first set up their home and we went to visit them, I was surprised to see the floors in their house, when Sallyanne lived at home we never saw the floor in her bedroom, I thought there was something wrong with the wardrobes, as all her clothes kept falling out onto the floor.

It's amazing, you think you only have one daughter, until she sets up her own home, then you wonder what happened to the daughter that used to live in your house, you know, the one that thought the hoover was a piece of funky sixties artwork and the washing machine was an old silent movie you watched during breakfast.

After all these years I still can't work out how a woman's mind works. For example, my wife gave me a couple of shirts for Christmas, a red one and a blue one. so being a Christmassy colour, I put the red one on before sitting down to Christmas dinner, but as soon she saw me she said, "Oh! you're wearing the red one. Don't you like the blue one then?” after dinner I offered to take her on a trip round the world, but she said she wanted to go somewhere else.

Anyway getting back to Sallyanne, there are a few thing Ian should be aware of by now and some maybe he's not, I didn't think it wise to say anything before he'd gone through the wedding ceremony, just in case he changed his mind, Oh by the way I forgot to thank JAMES, the best man for getting him to the church on time and thanks for bringing back the handcuffs, you'll get your deposit back latter.

Sallyanne, well, what can you say about Sallyanne?

She has always brightened up our lives, as she never switched anything off, she's never had anything to wear, but she could always fill every wardrobe in the house with it, when she does find something to wear, she dresses to kill, but unfortunately she cooks the same way, ——–sorry I'm only joking really.

Sallyanne is a smart young lady, she showed from an early age that she would always be one step ahead, she was a marvel at dreaming up excuses, she has always been able to twist her mum round here finger. Once, many years ago whilst potty training, she had a little accident on her bedroom floor and on hearing her mum coming, she, quick as a flash, grabbed the cat by the scruff of the neck and whilst rubbing it's nose in here little accident said, naughty cat, naughty, naughty cat.

Anyway I would like to finish off by giving a few words of wisdom to the newly weds, as Sallyanne well knows, we have over the years had our ups and downs, Marg and I have not always seen eye to eye, but she tells me, Marriage is a partnership and SHE KNOWS BEST, you just remember that IAN and you won't go far wrong.

But seriously, never go to bed on an argument, Never let your kids go to bed without a smile, kiss and make up in the morning, as today is a new day, never look back on the bad times, it's your new world out there, grab hold of it and make what you will of it.

Finally IAN, the best thing you could ever give your wife on your anniversary, is to remember it, a nice card could get you a night out with the lads and a bunch of flowers and who knows.

May you live long and be happy, may all your storms be little ones and remember that marriage is not just about finding the perfect partner, it's about being one as well.

Ladies and gentlemen, please be upstanding, I would like to propose a toast to the Bride and Groom.

Mr & Mrs Ian Jones,

Note: in the following I had pre-arranged with the ushers to present a Bouquet of flowers to the Bride, her Mom and the Grooms Mom.

And now ladies and gentlemen, before I hand you over to Ian, I would just like to show my appreciation to Sallyanne with this token of our love and affection for her, for just being who she is, for Sallyanne

And to my wife Margaret, for being the mother of our children, the anchor in our family and for the love and wisdom, which has guided us all throughout our lives, for Margaret

And finally for Sue, just for being Ian's Mom and a wonderful Gran to Archie

And now, that's enough from me, so ladies and gentlemen, It is now with great pleasure I hand you over to my Son in Law IAN.