Speech by David Gilbert

Speech Type: Father of the bride/groom
Speech Creator: David Gilbert
Speech Date: Aug2004
Ladies & Gentlemen

I'd like to begin by offering my sincere thanks and appreciation to all those who have worked so hard and long to help put this day together, and to you our Very Special Guests for joining with us on a day which, I am sure, Vicky and Mark will cherish for the remainder of their lives together.

Now, I'm only going to speak for a few moments because of my throat….Vicki said if I talked too long, she'd cut it!

Just before a few truths about our Daughter I am very pleased to welcome Mark to our family, it's not so much as losing a daughter but as gaining a handyman…even though the central heating timer stills need sorting!

My wife and I and indeed my whole family are privileged to have you join us through this marriage, we welcome you Mark!

At this point I'd like to apologize in advance for any misdemeanours that may happen today, not that I've said or done anything wrong yet, but that apology at least gives me some scope…?

Vicky, Vicki, Victoria, indeed MRS VICTORIA JADE JOSEPH…WOW! From the very day, no from the day before you were born we knew you'd be special, with a Dad like me you had to be, oh and Mom played a part as well…the year you were born 1981, indeed Monday, 31 August 1981 at around 5.00pm…

I remember it well…a warm summer breeze wafting gently through the open window at Good Hope Hospital, your Mom lazing gently on crisp white cotton sheets flicking the pages of some overpriced woman's magazine which gave advice and hints on how to get in exactly the condition your Mom was right in then…

and me, oh I was daydreaming of what you were to be, a Boy or a Girl…WHAT! Are you kidding!!!!! True Mom was relaxed, GAS you know, but that didn't stop me having the life squeezed out of my hand by Mom (there's affection for you!) and during what seemed to be the rush hour at Euston Station out you popped, pretty pink, gorgeous and more hair than I've had for a long time!

What your Mom really remembers is that whilst she was served warm cottage pie and peas with gravy that tasted like the Thames, I was tucking into Tornados Rossini, a Few glasses of Fine Red Wine, finished with a brandy and cigar, then off to the RAF Club to announce the birth and consume a little more pop!

Some interesting facts – what else happened on that day although not the same year…

12 AD – Born this day, Gaius Caeser, 3rd Roman emperor (37-41 AD). Better known by his childhood nickname of Caligula, meaning ‘little boots’ – and best remembered for his extreme cruelty.

1887 – Thomas Edison patented the kinetoscope, the first device for producing motion pictures. Shortly after that was the time your Granddad became a cinema projectionist? He's now asking Grandma “What did he say…What did he say?”

1900 – Coca-Cola went on sale in Great Britain for the first time.

1984 – Purple Rain the movie, starring Prince, opened across the UK.

Do you remember, I bought you tickets, but at 3yrs old you couldn't get in so your Mom and I went…

And on your birthday this year…

2004 – you will have been married for 17 days…

We named you Victoria as we thought that would be a very proper and strong name for your future, we added Jade as this means (originally to the Chinese and then us) the birth of a priceless daughter…and of course all daughters are priceless (wink wink) it is also a much admired Gem…just like you!

Mrs Victoria Jade Joseph
do you remember when… (no harp music)
When Mom showed you around your first school, just down the road and the teacher asked would you like to come back tomorrow? You said NO! Then she said would you like to come back next week? You said NO again but added I want to stay NOW! And so you did and eventually onto University where you gained your HND & BA (with Honours) – well done again!

do you remember when…
You played The Virgin Mary in the school Nativity Play, I think this was because your Welsh language was not quite up to speed and this was a non speaking part…but I was glad when your language was up to speed when you heard the assistant at the Leisure Centre say don't give his money back after I complained about the state of a badminton court! – thanks again!

do you remember when…
You and your friends wrote and recorded a sample CD a track called ‘couldn't you stay?’ and I kept shouting couldn't you stop, no it really was a beautiful touching song and I can play it here now to remind you… only joking!

do you remember when…
As a massive fan of the Boy Band 911 you and Mom travelled to Glasgow to be on a TV show with them…well please welcome from 911… only joking!

And do you remember when…
I said one day you will meet your Prince and Marry him… I wasn't joking!

So today Prince Mark it is my honour to hand over the care of our precious Gem to you……

I'm sure you will value her as much as we do, about 100 Grand to date!

So just before we start 2 hours of Bingo…well I've got get some money back somehow, I haven't paid the Caterers yet…

I'd like to read a small ditty…

To Mark & Vicky Joseph

14th August 2004

Never been married before

But today that's all new

Something Special for you two

It's a Great Club

This Marriage thing

Very selective

And very left/right wing

This means you have to Give

And you have to Take

Marks Learns to Iron

And Vicky learns to Bake

You'll soon understand

You need more in the band

And like sheep on the lawn

Loads of kids will be born

And when this Grandma and Granddad

Say off to bed now, let's tuck you in

Well tell ‘em stories of this day

And about this Fine Weddin’

And one day, God Willing

When it's your turn to do this deed

We hope it turns out just fine

And you follow my good lead

So with our hearts blessing

And honest no messing

We send you this part

God Bless you both with all our heart!

Our love Always and Forever

Mom & Dad

And Finally…

Ladies and Gentlemen would you please be upstanding for my last few borrowed, but heart felt words…

May God abundantly bless you both

May you live as long as you wish and have all you need for as long as you live

May the road you choose be smooth and any burden light

May your joys be everlasting and may all your pain be………champagne

TOAST: LADIES & GENTLEMEN – THE BRIDE & GROOM