Speech by gordon allen

Speech Type: Father of the bride/groom
Speech Creator: gordon allen
Speech Date: 17/07/2014 22:51:54

SPEECH BY THE BRIDE'S FATHER

Ladies and Gentlemen, firstly my wife and I would like to thank you all for being here to share with Victoria and Phil this special day.

We would also like to thank the staff of the Brockencote Hall Hotel for looking after us, and as they continue to look after us for the rest of our time here.

Thanks also to Victoria's bridesmaids; Paula, Emma, Kate, Sally and Gemma for doing such a splendid job of getting Victoria ready for today and not leaving her in the red-light district of Amsterdam.

Also in the bridal party to whom thanks are due are Evie our flower-girl

and her brother Ben who did such a good job as ring-bearer.

Natasha, thank you for that beautiful singing in the church.

Thanks to Simon, Phil's Bestman, and Michael and Carl, his Ushers for taking care of Phil and ensuring that we did not have to unchain him from a lamppost whilst he was only in his underwear.

Mark who has boldly stepped into my shoes behind the camera to take the wedding photographs, thank you Mark. I will be checking your work later.

As the father of the bride I have two very wise instructions concerning this speech,

1) do not open with the line “Unaccustomed as I am to public speaking”, because that will become painfully obvious as I go on

and

2) do not go on ——- too much, because I do have a reputation of boring people to sleep.

So please try to stay awake as there may be one or two pieces in this worth listening to.

What can I say about Victoria?

Well one of my proudest moments was on the 24th November 1981 when I first held her in my arms. She was such a tiny scrap of a thing. I remember thinking; this is my little girl,

I have to look after her and look out for her.

There is an old song, which includes the lines

“when you're the father of boys how you worry,

but when you're the father girls you do more than this,

you prey.”

Had I been a man given to praying I could not have asked for more in a daughter than we have in Victoria. Not only beautiful on the outside but she has an inner beauty, a beauty of spirit.

She is warm, generous and kind, with a determination to see things through.

Most importantly, she knows how to smile.

As they used to say in the olden days; “her heart is in the right place”.

I have been at the outstanding events of her life; he birth, her first days at school, checking out her university place, her degree graduation and her graduation as a teacher; and today possibly the most important her wedding.

Early in her life the subject of winning came up between us, and I told her, “of cause I would like you to win, but I want you to do more than that, I want you to do your best. For no one could ask more of anyone than their best.”

I am pleased to say that Victoria has always done that, whether she was running a marathon for charity, or learning lines for a play, she never gave less than her best.

With great pride and sometimes amusement Susan and I watched Victoria grow-up. One Christmas we bought her one of the Barbie toys. The toy was not important what Victoria favoured was the box it came in, she spent nearly all Christmas in that cardboard box. It was Dad who had to cut windows for her to open so she could see the television, and a trap-door for her food.

She would have slept in that box had I let her.

Before she became too big I used to balance her on my feet in the air. I told her that if we became good enough acrobats we could run off and join the circus, well I never was good enough, but despite that Victoria grew into quite a sports woman, where she got that from I do not know. Synchronised swimming was her big thing. I often thought we had given birth to a fish.

At 5:30 some Saturday mornings I would drive her to the swimming pool for practice. Whilst she was in the pool, bright as a button, I fell asleep in the public gallery.

Until the theme tune from Casualty was played. Then I had to wake-up and watch because that was Victoria's tune. Even today the Casualty theme is like an alarm clock to me, and if for nothing else I start paying attention for that.

It was through sport that Victoria and Phil met. They had separately gone to Foxhollies Leisure Centre for an A Level sports moderation. As I understand the story the boys, having finished, went over to eye-up the girls, Victoria was there doing trampolineing, well something clicked with them and as a result of that chance encounter we are here today celebrating their wedding.

They went to different universities and with them being away from each other I thought they may drift apart, but no, and at the weekends they even had jobs together as lifeguards

Acting was another great passion in her life. When she had a part to learn she usually asked me to go through the lines with her, although more often than not she told me when I got it wrong.

On one occasion at home Victoria was doing some cooking, I said to her “be careful with that knife, I have just sharpened it”. With some indignation in her voice she replied, “Dad you don't have to tell me, I'm all grown-up now”. So she was; or nearly so, all of 16 and fiercely independent.

As we watched her growing, I suppose like all fathers of daughters, I knew that someday she would bring someone home and say, “This is the one I want to spend the rest of my life with”. I suppose like all fathers of daughters, I was fully prepared to say,

“Good grief Victoria, what are you thinking of. You could do much better than this”.

Well Janet and Robin, I never did say that, because the boy she brought home was your son. Phil is a credit to you and I took to him straight away.

It is said that if a couple go on holiday together and on their return they are still speaking to each other they won't go far wrong. Well Victoria and Phil did better than that. They went all round the World together. When Victoria told me that she had this marvellous opportunity to go travelling round the World and asked me if she should go, my immediate thought was, “how can I look out for her when she is half a World away”. But when she said Phil would be going as well I had little hesitation in saying, “Yes go”. They had such adventures and brought back some wonderful memories,……….and they were still speaking to each other.

When Victoria and Phil were going on holiday to Italy where he planed to ask her to marry him, he came to me first to ask my permission to propose. Now I thought manners like that died-out with Queen Victoria, but seemingly not, and I appreciated that courtesy.

I know that I am bias but I will say this, “Phil, you have picked a good one”. If in the coming years you find yourselves back to back fighting life's adversities, Phil you need not keep looking over your shoulder because Victoria will be there, she will be minding your back as you will be there minding hers. I am sure you won't let her down; I know she won't let you down.

If you were to ask a dozen people what makes a marriage work you would probably get a dozen different answers, one of the nicest I have come across was written over a hundred years ago by Thomas Hardy.

In ‘Far from the Madding Crowd’ Hardy has the ever patient Gabrel Oak say this to Bathsheba Everdene

“At home by the fire,

            whenever YOU look up, there I shall be and

                 whenever I look up there will be YOU”.

On a few occasions Victoria needed a shoulder to cry on, and I like to think that my shoulder helped to make things better.

Until recently it has been my honour to be the most important man in Victoria's life. Earlier today I “gave Victoria away”, and have now taken a step back and am only the second most important, but as long as she is happy, I can live with that.

Susan and I will continue to take an interest in her and her future achievements. We will also be interested in Phil because although Victoria is now part of Phil's family, Phil is also part of ours. Victoria you have a new shoulder to cry on if you need it, but remember this, no matter how big you get, no matter how old you are, you will always be my little girl.

Ladies and gentlemen please raze your glasses in a toast to Victoria and Phil.

May you be comfortable in each other's company,

May you listen to what the other has to say,

May you take pleasure in each other's joy and,

May you always be as happy as you are today.

VICTORIA AND PHIL.