Speech by Jim Brade

Speech Type: Father of the bride/groom
Speech Creator: Jim Brade
Speech Date: oct 2003
Good afternoon everyone.

I will try to keep this as short as possible because we've got to be out of here by 10.30.

So, GET THE ALE IN Early!

PAUSE

Can I start by extending a warm welcome, on behalf of Mary and myself, to Mary & Gary, Mark's Mum and Dad and all their relatives. (PAUSE 45 applause).

Our relatives led by the two Queen Mums Lily and Aggie. (PAUSE 62)

and all friends of both families to this very happy occasion.

PAUSE

I would like to thank the registrar for the lovely service in this beautiful setting.

As a kid I used to walk around this Liverpool version of Crystal Palace with my Mum and Dad but I never thought that one day I would be standing inside wondering “How much does the window cleaner charge?”

I should warn you, Mark. The new conservatory won't be big enough after this! Our Ann-Marie always thinks BIG ‘cos look at the size of you!

You know what they say about the bigger you are the harder you fall.…
Well Mary and I are glad you fell for our Ann-Marie and decided to take our beautiful daughter's hand in marriage.

At this point I would like to thank all those who have helped to make this a memorable day for everyone.

First….…

Our NINE bridesmaids.
Stephanie & Nicola, (Frank/Paula's)
Debbie,
Paula,
Margaret.… (Is she still arguing over who got the brides bouquet?)
Helen / Caitlin,
Our granddaughter Jacqueline,
Mary (Ireland?)
They all looked stunning in their …was it Emerald Green gowns?
At this point thanks to our own family dress-maker Dolores. She weaved her own particular brand of Irish magic.

Let's not forget the pages Shaun & Adam. A BIG hand for them. They did a marvellous job. They managed to stay immaculate but like all pages I bet they'll be a bit dog-eared by the end of the day.

Relax lads you can loosen your waistcoats and let your hair down after this.

In charge of this rabble and Lord of the Ring was the Best Man, Andrew, Mark's taller brother. Do they get any taller?
My thanks to Andrew. I'm sure they gave you more trouble than an RAF squadron.

A large family event like this doesn't just happen and I know Ann-Marie and Mark have been working like the clappers for the past 12 months.

On behalf of Mary and myself, thanks to all those who made today possible.

PAUSE

Ann-Marie has been a credit to us both. From the time she was born I knew she would be something special when she started playing football better than the lads and throwing me over her shoulder with one of her karate moves. So watch yourself Mark, you can get BIG surprises in small packets!

Mark, shares Ann-Marie's birth-year, 1972, but I'm sure it won't be the only thing he shares during their married life together.

One of my first impressions of Mark was that he bore more than a passing resemblance to Frankenstein but then I realised it was his fancy dress for their engagement party night. Ann-Marie didn't look much better in her Bride of Dracula outfit.

They are a much better sight in their outfits today besides Ann-Marie won't have to worry about Frankenstein's boots during the first Waltz!

PAUSE

At this stage the bride's father usually gives the newly-weds some advice and during their time together I'm sure Mark and Ann-Marie have learnt how not to put their foot in it.

But To Mark one word of warning ;

Stay out of the loft;

Also,

The man who says his wife can't take a joke,
Forgets that she took him.

To Ann-Marie ;
It's not the man in your life that counts,

It's the life in your man.

PAUSE

Mary and I are very proud today to see Ann-Marie, looking so beautiful, married to Mark and taking the name Mrs Ann-Marie De-Vaal-Brade. That's a double-double hyphen name. I told you she thinks BIG.

To you both I would like to finish off (PAUSE for a Huge sigh of relief)
With these words of advice;

Never go to bed on an argument.

And just love each other.

PAUSE

HAVE HAMMER TO BANG TABLE

ATTENTION!!!

Ladies and Gentlemen

I would like to propose a toast.

To the Bride and Groom Mr & Mrs De-Vaal-Brade.

Here's to the Past, for all that you've learned.

Here's to the Present for all that you share.

Here's to the Future that you plan together.

May the roof never fall in (AGAIN)

And may you never fall out.

Ladies and Gentlemen, please be upstanding, and raise your glasses.

TO ANN-MARIE and MARK

The BRIDE and GROOM.

DRINK

I would now like to hand you over to my new son-in-law Mark.