Speech by Mark Gladson

Speech Type: Father of the bride/groom
Speech Creator: Mark Gladson
Speech Date: 14/06/2012 17:08:05

As the bride's father, it's my pleasant duty, on behalf of Faith and myself, John's parents Helen and Ivan and, of course, the happy couple, to welcome you to Anna and John's wedding celebration.

You've travelled in from every point of the compass: southwards from Lancashire, westwards from Suffolk, northwards from Dubai, eastwards from New York, and from many, many other points in between. You're here because you've played a key part in the lives of Anna and John, and it's truly fantastic to see you all. Thank you for coming.

Some of you may've noticed there've been changes of venue from the original plans: the ceremony was moved to London – to St Dunstan's Church where Anna was christened, and the reception here to the Bank of England Sports Centre. We made the changes, with John's family's agreement, because of events around Faith's health, and thank you all of you for your flexibility in adapting. May I just say it is a great relief and a joy for us that we are here as a complete family today. To Faith I will say that for the rest of us to see you sitting there, as sprightly as ever, is an unimaginable blessing and happiness.

Thanks are especially due today to Anna's friend Christa, for playing so beautifully during the signing of the registers, to Helen for creating a magnificent wedding cake, and for support in innumerable other ways from John's new brother in law Alex and new sister-in-law-to-be Julie, and from Anna's new sisters-in-law Faye and Zeena.

In fact, if I can say so on Bank of England premises, they've all done a sterling job! And on that theme, please do make sure your glasses contain some liquid assets to drink the bride and groom's health in a few minutes! 

First though, I'd like to share some thoughts.  Fathers tend to be biased where daughters are concerned and I'm no exception. In you Anna I see an independent, brilliant and beautiful young woman.  Let me say, Anna, how truly proud we are of you today.

I've been thinking how I could, for everyone here, sum up Anna's very essence. Anna's early character gave clues to the later, fully fledged person – and I'd like to mention some of the things she said and did when little, to illuminate the Anna of today.

She was and is extremely imaginative and inventive.  Aged 5, she looked up at the night sky and explained how the stars are in fact sparks flying off the moon's surface. Age 6, she and brother Alex devised a business that she described like this: “We manufacture DOGS with different abilities: first the poetry-reciting dog, mainly Wordsworth; and then a new tutu-wearing dog; a sneezing dog; a dog that recites its 10 times table backwards very fast; and a dog that does sheep impressions – I think we've put the wrong printed circuits in that one!”  

You'll note an affection for dogs, kept till today. This did sometimes go a little far.  Age 4 Anna informed me: “I'm going to marry a dog!” I'm glad to say that turned out to be an inaccurate forecast.

Anna was a compassionate child, which I think has reached into adulthood. Age 4 she made up a prayer about the Noah's Ark story: “Dear God, You ARE very kind, but when you sent that flood the water came up the sides of the boat and the animals nearly sank. Next time you send a flood, you MUST be more careful. Amen”. 

The power of that instruction is still ringing in the ears of the powers-that-be because today they haven't dared send rain and we've had the first glorious sunshine for many days.

Various diplomatic and bargaining skills were there in Anna early on; she was especially good at forestalling objections. Age 3, one teatime: “I need a sandwich. And I need some hot chocolate in my cup. That is fair, Mummy, that is fair”. Today she is applying negotiation skills like these at the Washington Embassy where (in very broad terms) she controls the flow of American entrepreneurs into and out of the UK. I can hear it now: “That is fair, Mr Obama, that is fair”.

Anna always had a tremendously energetic and passionate approach to things, which she injected into everything she did, especially acting and theatre – playing the part of Jane Austen and many others in school plays – and lots of Shakespeare parts – she loves Shakespeare – including a sardonic Beatrice in Much Ado about Nothing, a love-struck Malvolio in Twelfth Night, a ruthless Lady Macbeth in That Play at the Edinburgh Festival. John, I feel sure married life will be lit up by flashes of or even prolonged bursts of dramatic energy and enthusiasm in the years ahead.

When small, Anna had a much-loved hamster who she said was: “a kind of kamikaze hamster, always jumping from tall heights – but always surviving”. Anna herself has also always been an adventurous soul, loving the tang of danger hinted at by the Wild East, by countries like Kazakhstan, Bulgaria, Tadzhikistan and Macedonia, where she has travelled, worked, learnt some of their languages, written about them for the travel pages of the Times and the Michelin Guide Vert series.

Both her and John's adventurous destinations are reflected in your table names – from Beijing to thye Cape of Good Hope to Vladivostok – and surely the list will grow in years to come. 

So there you have a little whistle-stop tour of Anna past and present, through my eyes – though really it just scratches the surface.

At this point I'd like to welcome into the family no less a person than our new son-in-law, John. Obviously during the time we've known John we've come to realise how much he means to Anna. He is to us a calm, clever, humorous and generous person; and also, according to Anna who has more of an inside track on him, a lover of pork scratchings, politics, facts, Twitter, and beer, and eloquent on the subject of Leeds United.

Anna says she thinks of him as a Yorkshire Serb: a fiercely nationalistic lover of his county, ready to defend it against Lancashire at any moment. She adds that on the flip side, he is a peaceable soul who avoids confrontation and gets on with everyone; is ready to try anything; and determined to spend his life quote “just having a lovely time”.  He also has, she says, a beautiful tenor voice, and owns more than one pair of red trousers.

We're also delighted to welcome into the fold two extremely nice people without whom John wouldn't be here today, John's parents, Helen and Ivan.

Now, it's usual on these occasions to offer the happy couple some worldly advice on marriage, and I thought other weddings held on other June 9^ths might inspire here. 

I looked at one June 9^th  wedding that took place in 53BC between the Roman emperor Nero and his empress Claudia. Sad to say, everything they say about Nero seems true: he was pretty much an early Berlusconi, with a lot of bunga bunga parties and corruption going on. Worse still, on their 9^th wedding anniversary he had Claudia executed – meaning he has not that much to teach us for John and Anna's wedding day.  

Much more promising was the wedding on June 9, 1156, of Beatrice, Countess of the French wine-making region Burgundy.  

In those days, it was the custom much more than it is now for people to offer nuggets of advice and wisdom to each other on such occasions in the form of proverbs and folk sayings.

I found 5 medieval French proverbs that I like to think might well have been offered to Beatrice and her husband on that June 9^th and I offer them now to Anna and John.

The first proverb or folk saying is about achieving more  together in your lives by daring to be adventurous: “Qui ne bouge pas de Paris ne sera jamais Pape” (please forgive my French accent): “He who never budges from Paris will never be pope”. 

The second is about patience as you work together towards a dream, and it is: “It's only link by link that the knight's coat of chainmail is forged.”

The third is about gently encouraging each other rather than insisting too much. The proverb is: “The first natural pressing of the wine is better than the second forced pressing”!

The fourth is about giving each other hope when times get tough –  in French: “Ne meurs cheval, herbe te vient”.  “Horse, don't die, grass is coming”. 

And even if you forget all those bits of medieval folk wisdom, this last one is worth remembering. “Il n'y a qu'un bonheur dans la vie, c'est d'aimer et d’être aimé”. “There's only one happiness in life, to love and be loved”…and it applies equally to newly-weds, husbands, wives, children, families, friends – wherever you can find it and give it.

I think that advice, though 800 years old, is timeless.

So to introduce the toast, I'd like to come back to Shakespeare, and quote Prospero, the father in The Tempest, as he gives his daughter's hand in marriage.

To Anna I'd like to say:

“Now all the blessingsOf a glad father compass thee about!”

To John

“As my gift and thine own acquisition,Worthily deserved, take my daughter”.  

And for you both:

“Look down, you gods,And on this couple drop a blessed crown!” 

Ladies and Gentlemen, please be upstanding and let's drink a toast (PAUSE: AS THEY GET UP); a toast inspired by enthusiasm, hope and love, for the new Mr and Mrs Middleford.  Here's to the future, for all that you look forward to, during a long and happy life together. To the Bride and Groom, ANNA AND JOHN.