Speech by Martin H

Speech Type: Father of the bride/groom
Speech Creator: Martin H
Speech Date: 10/09/2012 12:29:27

Father of Bride Speech

Good afternoon everyone, Xxxxx and I are really pleased to welcome you here today at this beautiful location for the wedding of our daughter, Xxxxx, and our new son-in-law, Xxxxx.

We would like to extend a special welcome to Xxxxx’ mother, Xxxxx, and father, Xxxx, and their partners, Xxxx and Xxxx.

We are also very pleased to have with us today Xxxxx's grandma and my mum Xxxxx, and Xxxxx’ grandma and grandpa, Xxxx and Xxxx.  There are also a few people who have come a very long way to be here. First we have Xxxxx and Xxxxx who have travelled from America, then we have Xxxx Xxxx who has flown in from Portugal and finally we have Xxxx who has made the trip all the way from Russia.  We would like to give them a special welcome and thank them for making such an effort to be here.

As you can imagine, there is a lot of planning that goes into a day like today and we would like to thank everyone who has helped with the preparations.

Much of what you see here has been down to Xxxxx and Xxxxx who have worked so hard in getting everything right.  Although Xxxxx will be thanking people more formally later, I would just like to thank Xxxxx and Xxxx for making the wonderful wedding cake that you see here to what, I understand, is a special family recipe. I am sure it will taste as good as it looks.

What you see today shows Xxxxx and Xxxxx’ approach to so much of what they do, they have worked really hard together to make this a great day for everyone. 

This is a quality that Xxxxx has shown ever since she was a young girl; she has always wanted to “do things properly”. This applied to everything she has done, whether school work, university or now her job.  She is naturally a very modest person and not someone who likes to make a big fuss about things, but I am sure you will agree with me that she has no reason to feel modest about how she looks today, because today she looks really beautiful.

When you have children you cannot help wondering what part of yourself seems to have been passed down to them.  Xxxxx has clearly inherited her beauty from her mum but from me she has inherited a certain skill with spreadsheets which has really enabled us to bond in the last few weeks.  We have had spreadsheets for invitations sent and returned, we have had a “wedding countdown” spreadsheet and even a “who is sleeping where and when” spreadsheet. 

Xxxxx and I are so pleased that, in Xxxxx, she has found a real soul mate, with their shared interest in history, politics, music, and obscure films and so much else. What gives us most pleasure however is their clear love for each other.

They also share love for a ginger tom cat called Xxxx, yes, the same Xxxx who spent three days up a tree and had to be rescued by the fire brigade.  Sadly Xxxx could not be with us today!

But most of all they have found happiness together, which has been so apparent today.  Xxxxx and I welcome Xxxxx into our family just as I know Xxxxx and Xxxxx will welcome Xxxxx into theirs.

It is traditional at this point in the father of the bride's speech to give the newly married couple some sound advice.  As we live in the internet age I thought I would Google  “advice for newlyweds” and skipping Russell Brand's less well known book on the subject and some websites of a more medical nature I found  a website called Adviceopedia which offered lots of advice. For example

• When a man gets married, he should leave the past behind him and forget all his mistakes. After all, there is no use in two people remembering the same things.

• The question that will most rapidly drive fear into the heart of a man is, “Honey, do I look fat in this?” If you are approached with this question, falling to the floor in a mock coma is recommended.

• Married couples should share decision making, the husband should make all the important decisions such as, what should be in the chancellors next budget, who should host the next Olympics and of course, who should be in Nottingham Forest's back four on Saturday.  The wife should make all the unimportant decisions, such as where they live, what house to buy, where they go on holiday and how many children to have.

I thought this was all good advice but there were a few things missing that I felt, from personal experience needed to be added.

• First, in my experience, the question that begins with “when were you thinking of doing the … “ is not a question, and so the answer is never “the thought never passed my mind”. The reply “when you have decided the colour” can sometimes however buy a little time.

• The response to “is that what you are going to be wearing?” is, “No, I was just checking the size before I took it to the charity shop dear!”

• And the response to “you won't be drinking too much will you is” “No, I shall have a small half and then be sipping tepid water all night”.

My final bit of advice is on words that a husband should never find themselves saying.  These include:

“I thought we had agreed not to give each other presents this year!”

and

“do you mind if we keep the telly on”

and finally;

“but she is just a friend!”

Joking aside I know that Xxxxx and Xxxxx love each other very much and are going to have a long a happy marriage so before I hand over to Xxxxx, I would like everyone to rise and toast the bride and groom.

To Xxxxx and Xxxxx