Speech by Ray Nicholls

Speech Type: Father of the bride/groom
Speech Creator: Ray Nicholls
Speech Date: Sep2006
Ladies and gentlemen, family and friends.

You will have guessed by now that I am Juliet's proud DAD and it's my privilege to make the first speech.

I should also warn you that I have been known to shed a tear at weddings, birthdays and barmitzvahs so please bear with me.

On behalf of my wife, Ann and myself, I would like to welcome you all here today, in particular Jim's parents Maureen and Barry and many of you who have travelled a long way.

I realise of course I am only the starter act for the groom and best men to follow, so I decided a long speech would test their skills and leave less time for all of you at the free bar afterwards.

I did hint to Juliet that to elope and marry in Gretna Green or on some tropical beach would be very romantic and a lot cheaper, but she had to go traditional on me.

Jim please note that hints don't work, but I must congratulate Aldermaston Manor and their staff who have done us proud today.

It seems only a few years ago that I helped deliver and welcome Juliet into this world and now, with some relief, I have given her away.

Juliet has been a delight for me and her life has been a series of phases. From her angelic early childhood, which encouraged us into a having a not so angelic second child, my apologies Derek, to her discovery of make-up and boys, when she progressively came home later and later, to her gothic period when she went to parties in beautiful dresses wearing Doc Martin boots!

She flowered into a pretty young girl who went off to university and emerged a determined pushy business graduate who was annoyed at having to stack cabbages in her first job.

Little did we realise that she had also found her man and as her relationship with Jim developed she finally became the beautiful happy lady we have seen today.

Not so long ago I asked her what qualities she thought Jim admired in her and of course she went on for ages. Then I asked her what she saw in Jim and after a significant pause she said “he's just Jim”. And somehow I knew what she meant.

So welcome to the family son in law, but perhaps Jim, I might also offer you some advice from my 36 years of marriage to my lovely lady.

Remember you have two ears and one mouth, so you are expected to listen twice as much as you speak. When you are wrong just admit it, if you may be right, then shut up and if all else fails say “I love you.”

You should encourage Juliet's artistic streak as this will reduce the amount of decorating you have to do, likewise always admire her green fingers which will help with the gardening, and lastly, never do household chores well or you will be expected to continue with them.

Finally, I hope a helpful quote for both of you.
Marriage is like a pair of scissors, two parts joined so they cannot be separated, often moving in opposite directions, but always able to come together to punish anyone who tries to come between them.

I looked to see what other important events have happened on the 22 September and discovered in 1893 Charles and Frank Duryea built the first automobile which supersedes all our table theme companies.

In 1974 Gillette invented the plastic disposable razor which most of us have used and finally in 2006 on the day of your wedding the Ryder Cup started.
So before I go and check the score will you please be upstanding to join me in a toast to the bride and groom.

The toast is Good Health, Significant Wealth and Much Happiness
To Juliet and Jim