Speech by Richard J Hodges

Speech Type: Father of the bride/groom
Speech Creator: Richard J Hodges
Speech Date: mar 2003

Ladies and Gentlemen, WELCOME,

It is a long time since I've had to stand up and make speech in front of an audience, so I am reminded of ABC of public speaking ‘Always Be Confident and most importantly the XYZ , before you stand up ‘ Examine Your ZIP’

This is a very happy day for Diana and myself. The old saying is exactly right – we haven't lost a daughter, we have gained a son.

It's a pleasure to welcome you, Paul, and your family, particularly your parents Brian and Pauline.
A special welcome also to your Aunt Margaret and Cousin Samantha all the way Canada.
Welcome to all relatives and friends. It's particularly nice to see so many of Carolyn and Paul's special friends here today.

As much as you try not to interfere in their lives, you always hope that once your children grow up, that they will make the right choices and that things will go well for them.

So we're delighted Carolyn chose someone we like so much to be her partner.

Carolyn was born way back in 1970, I blinked, and here I am proposing the toast to her and her husband on her Wedding Day. .… Where has the time gone?

Such a lot has happened and I feel particularly proud as I stand here and see our lovely daughter celebrating her wedding day.… So perhaps we did get a few things right, as parents.

Cal was always quiet, clever and extremely conscientious, everything she did was tackled so thoroughly, schooling, exams, relationships. The only time she seemed to relax was at university, but maybe that was due to the company she was keeping. (only joking)

Anyway, I'm sure she must have approached selecting her mate in the same fashion, to end up with such a splendid chap as Paul.

After Carolyn left university, Diana and I waited anxiously to see what she would do. Choice of career was still undecided and boyfriends were few,
Angela, her sister, had gone off to London to further her career… Were we ever going to get rid of her!
However, during this time, she'd been persuaded, with a little help from her Uncle Roger, to join the local Rotaract club (junior arm of Rotary).
Here she met and made friends with a large circle of super people, many of whom are here today.

Then from time to time, I could overhear snippets of conversation with her Mum, referring to a handsome young man from ‘up north’ that had taken her fancy and who by an amazing coincidence was lodging at Cal's grandmother old house in town. .… BUT was he interested???
It seems he was, their friendship blossomed and he became a frequent visitor to our house, often carrying flowers. ( Diana misses the flowers even today)

Then we realised they were in love.

Then, as is the fashion today, they decided to set up home together and managed to buy a small house on the outskirts of Stratford.
In my day, things were much different, we were not so forward and were very innocent…
On our Wedding day Diana & I sat up all night waiting for our sexual relations to arrive.

So, what about Paul? What a lovely fellow, keen sportsman, so we got on well from the start. Like Carolyn he has worked hard to gain a good degree and recently completed a Masters to help further his career.

As I mentioned, Paul was sporting. Now when Carolyn was outlining her ideal partner she always stressed, he would not be a sportsman like her Dad, disappearing each weekend to play cricket from dawn to dusk.
However, love conquers all.

Over the past few years we got to know Paul even better, met his parents Brian and Pauline, later visiting them in their lovely home near Saddleworth Moor.
I'm sure, Brian and Pauline, like us were thrilled to hear that Paul and Carolyn were getting married.

And today is down to Carolyn & Paul. It's their Wedding, they planned it, they arranged it and now, THEY have the STARRING ROLES.

Now some advice.…

Know your place… I'm told that when Paul was at Junior School he was selected to perform in the school play. He played the part of a 30 year old married man, I can't remember the name of the play but when asked how he enjoyed acting, he replied ‘It's fine but can I have a speaking part next time’.

Always agree and I you dare disagree always apologise later. When your wife wants your opinion she will give it to you.

But seriously folks, as someone who has been happily married for nearly 40 years and speaking from great experience there is one thing I would like to warn the ‘new kid’ about.
It's something you'll just have to live with because no man has yet found a remedy… and that is .… The female mind.
It can be best summed up with this little story ..…

A woman bought her husband two ties for his birthday, a red one and a blue one. He was undecided which one to wear at his party that evening but appeared in the red one. As soon as his wife saw him she said ‘Oh! You're wearing the red one. Don't you like the blue one?

However, as Oscar Wilde said ‘Women are meant to be loved and not understood’.

Another piece of advice that I received on my Wedding day was from my Mother in Law.. she told me never go to bed on an argument… Stay up and fight!

But remember, Paul, A man is not complete until he is married, then he's finished
but also remember Carolyn, It takes a good wife to make a good husband.

Valentine cards, understandably stress burning love and priests and parson stress fidelity but we old married couples now the secret of a successful marriage is persistence, tolerance, patience, forbearance, tenacity, forgiveness and above a sense of humour.

Enough, of this frivolity, down to the real job in hand The Toast to the Bride & Groom. Which reminds me of a wedding I once attended where two of the guests were a Parson and a Priest.
When the priest was offered a drink for the toast he said ‘ I'll have a large whisky please’. When the Minister was asked the same he said ‘No thanks I'd rather go with a scarlet Woman than touch the demon alcohol.’
The priest promptly put his drink back on the tray and exclaimed ‘I didn't know there was a choice.
Now, the last thing I want to do today is offend anyone. .. so if there is a Priest or Minister present, I apologise. … and if there's a scarlet woman here, I'll meet you in the bar in 10 minutes!

The toast…

‘To all of you who come along today to help us celebrate this special occasion, of those we love and who love each other.
By your presence, you show friendship and love and bring greater joy to us all.’

So.. Carolyn and Paul…

Here's to the past, for all you have learned.
Here's to the present, for all that you share.
Here to the future, for all that you look forward to .… TOGETHER.

Ladies & Gentlemen, please be upstanding and raise your glasses to the Bride and Groom.

Carolyn and Paul