Speech by Andy

Speech Type: Groom
Speech Creator: Andy
Speech Date: 01/08/2018 21:30:14

[Thank Father of the Bride]

Thank you Ian and thank you for giving Tracy away and giving me the opportunity to stand here a very proud and lucky man being able to call the very beautiful person next to me my wife.

[Intro]

Over the last couple of weeks people have been asking me if I'm nervous about the day and giving my speech. Luckily my Infant School reign performing as the King of Oranges when I was 6 years old I think has stood me in pretty good stead, so the speech I'm okay with.

No, what has been keeping me awake is the combination of two small sweet-tooth monsters called Rocco and Fox and that big fragile cake over in the corner.

At this point the writing of the speech took two quite separate versions, but luckily we're still in business for now. Don't worry though cause if it does all still go wrong, I've got some Mr Kiplings in the car.

I have a few thank yous and toasts to go through so please make sure your glasses are charged and if you neck it on the first one, it's your own fault!

[Thank guests]

On behalf of my Wife and I, we would like to say a huge thank you to you all for coming, I know many of you have travelled a long way to be here. We are thrilled to have so many of our family and close friends surrounding us for our big day, it means a lot, and it's great to see some old friends reunited again.

For us, today is not about being formal, it's about relaxing, having fun, and celebrating our marriage, so I hope you can all stay through to the evening and join me in thoroughly embarrassing yourself on the dance floor, and for those that have to leave early, I would be grateful if you could find alternative ways of embarrassing yourselves before the photographer leaves.

[Absent friends and family]

There are some friends and family members that unfortunately have not able to join us today. They have sent their best wishes and are raising a glass to us. They are very much in our thoughts. Please raise your glasses in return to absent friends.

Before I get onto the main topic of talking about my Wife, there are a few specific people I would like to thank.

[Thank Lauren]

Firstly, to Lauren for arranging all the beautiful flowers you have seen today. Lauren is Rich's wife for those that don't know, and although Rich and I have been acting like we know what we're talking about “collecting and delivering the gyp”, which is short for Gypsophila, it was only recently I realised that the Gyp was actually a flower and that Tracy thankfully doesn't have any problems with her knees.

Anyway, I think you will all agree the flowers look amazing. You have put so much thought and care into getting it right for us and I know that Tracy is really pleased. So just have a little something as a token of our appreciation.

[Thank Phil]

Secondly to Phil, for being a sterling usher. Although I have to say though he did quite successfully put the jitters up me on Friday when he was talking about bringing whoopy cushions for Tracy's chair, and water pistols for ushering you to your seats, perhaps most worrying was that he thought the wedding was on Saturday. So I've got you a little something also mate, there's a diary in there for you too, give me a shout if you need any help using it.

[Thank Sue]

To Sue and Ian, thank you for making me feel so welcome into your family. You are two of the most generous people I know, and I've now given up trying to pay for things when you visit as I know it's a complete waste of time. Sue, I know therefore you will hate me giving you something, but it's only small and my way of saying thank you. And thank you for looking after the boys for the next 5 days whilst we sun it off in Italy.

[Thank Mum]

To my Mum, I stand here the person I am as a result of the upbringing and opportunities you have given me, and for that I will always be grateful. You have put others before yourself your whole life and I hope that you can soon find some time for you. I know you would do anything for me still if I asked, and although I may not always be the best at showing it, I love you and I appreciate all that you have done for me.

[Thank Rich]

To Rich, my best man, and lifelong friend, now I wouldn't normally say this to someone who has made me dress as a traffic cone and walk through 5,000 screaming Ed Sheeran fans, or visit the Newcastle dog track in a pair of frilly pink shorts and a tight pink top (that being said I have been told I looked pretty damn good and I do tend to agree), the guy is a legend. You are the best friend anyone could hope for, and have done a huge amount for me not just in organising today, but throughout my life. I love you mate.

[Gift]

Now before I move on Rich is about the most factually correct person I think I'll ever meet, he can remember dates and times to the hour going back no doubt to the day we first met. Well either that or he's been winging it the past 20 years knowing that nobody else could possible remember either. Of course this ability to remember every last detail has been making me very nervous indeed about the speech that is about to be delivered. The sedative I've slipped into his drink should be kicking in shortly, so when he starts slurring his words and you can't understand him, please just nod and laugh just to try to make him feel better.

Which brings me to my beautiful bride.

[Tracy]

Tracy and I first met in the Spencer Arms in Northampton, back in Jan 2013. I remember seeing this dinky little two seat sports convertible sliding quite literally in to the carpark. You looked gorgeous from the first moment you stepped out of the car and you have looked gorgeous to me every day since.

We hit it off straight away, talking for countless hours about the important things in life such as EastEnders, action films, and of course cheese. Tracy was also polite enough to show an interest in cars and I reciprocated about shoes.

We share so much of our everyday life things in common and are very much on each other's wavelength.

I went through a bit of a My Name is Earl thing a few years ago, which if you don't know is a TV program about a guy who is working through a list of all the things he has done wrong and people he has upset. One of the things I love most about Tracy is she knows the right thing to do by people and probably wouldn't have anything on her list. She is incredibly kind, very loyal and would do anything for any of her friends. That being said, if she did have a list, she would have put it down somewhere and now not be able to find it.

It wasn't long into our relationship before Tracy first uttered those magic words to me, “Andy, I think it's time you bought another car”, and that pretty much sealed the deal there and then for me, and we've been in love and I've been buying cars ever since.

Tracy and I both share a huge passion for everything Italian, I lean more towards Pizza and Ferrari and Tracy towards sun and Prosecco, but that's still a pretty awesome combination. We already have our retirement plans together sorted to go live out there, and I'm looking forward to every step of the journey of growing old together with you.

My pet name for Tracy is Sparkle, and you certainly live up to that today, you look so incredibly beautiful and I feel unbelievably lucky being able to stand here and in front of everyone to tell you how much I love you and how much I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you.

Please be upstanding and raise your glasses to my new wife.

[Bridesmaids]

Finally I would just like to thank some little people. To Lorna who has done a brilliant job of being our flower girl, you were awesome. Thank you very much Lorna, you look very pretty today and you helped to make our ceremony very special.

[Boys]

Lastly, I would like to mention my amazing children. I ask them both every night what they want to be when they grow up. Rocco wants to be a big, big monster truck crane, which although I'm not sure is an actual career path, does sound pretty cool and Fox wants to be a ga ga yah, but that's only because he can't speak yet!

You are our world, mummy and daddy love you very much and we are very proud of you both. That said, I won't lie that the next 5 days on honeymoon with just the two of us is something we are very much looking forward to. Good luck Sue!

So if I could ask you to raise a final toast .… To little people.

Right hopefully the sedative is doing it's job now, so I'll now you hand over to my Best Man.