Speech by Chris Healing

Speech Type: Groom
Speech Creator: Chris Healing
Speech Date: 02/11/2014 13:09:18

INTRO

Thanks Kath for your kind words.  Your speech was great, I don't suppose you want to do mine do you?

Being a quiet, retiring type, I'm not really accustomed to public speaking and I'm more than a little nervous about making this speech.  It'd be fair to say this isn't the first time today that I've stood up from a warm seat with pieces of paper in my hand! [PAUSE]

WELCOME

I've been looking forward to saying this for some time now and It gives me great pleasure and pride to say that on behalf of my wife and I… [PAUSE]  We would like to thank you all, our family and closest friends, for coming here today to celebrate our wedding day with us.  We know a lot of you have travelled a long way to be here and it means a great deal that you could make it.  Our day wouldn't be as special without you here.  Thanks for all of the cards and fabulous gifts we have received, they are very much appreciated.

I've been told that a good speech has a good beginning and end, and keeps both of those close together!  So I will try and keep it as short as possible, but in case I ramble on a bit too long the emergency exits in the room are… [POINT]  And please no pushing and shoving.

THANKYOUS AND TOASTS

Before I kick off the thankyous, could you please make sure you charge your glasses as I will be making a few toasts along the way.

TOAST ABSENT FAMILY AND FRIENDS

At this point I would like to take this oppurtunity to say that there are some people close to our hearts who cannot be with us today.  A special mention must be made of Jos dad David who is in our thoughts and hearts.  The best Dad a daughter could have, I know he would have been immensely happy and proud of you Jo, just as he has always been – and will be looking down on us today with a smile on his face.

So, if you would raise your glasses? “TO ABSENT FAMILY AND FRIENDS”

TOAST KATH

[TURN TO KATH] Kath… Traditionally I am supposed to thank you for welcoming me into your family but it seems strange to do that as you have made me feel welcome from day one.  Thank you for raising a beautiful, intelligent and “sometimes” stubborn daughter, letting me have her hand in marriage – and of course getting her up the aisle this morning! Thank you for everything you have done to make today possible. I hope it feels less like you losing a daughter and more like gaining a son – one you can cook for, clean up after and provide an endless supply of biscuits for.  I love Jo with all my heart and I will do everything I can to continue to keep her…I mean make her happy.  We have a little gift as a token of our thanks.  [JO – PRESENT]

So a toast, “TO KATH”

TOAST MUM AND DAD

[TURN TO MUM AND DAD] Mum and Dad… To find the words to thank you is a difficult task.  With all the time in the world I could never convey my gratitude for the love and support you have given me over the years. Thank you for everything you have done for today – not least Dad for spending countless hours making the best wedding cake I have ever seen and my Mum for perfecting the wedding stationary.  There is another thing to thank you for too – if it hadn't been for you badgering me into joining the social group IVC Jo and I might never have met.  I'm sure you remember the holiday to Cornwall in 2007 when I kept asking to borrow your mobile (Dad) so I could stand outside the caravan in dark woods freezing my bits off, so I could talk to my “friend”.  On my eventual return on the first night, when you asked who I was talking to for all that time, I replied: “Just a friend.  She talks a lot.”  I think then you had an inkling that something might be afoot. I could not ask for better parents and love you both dearly.  If it wasn't for you I can honestly say I wouldn't be standing here now.  So thanks for the lift! We have a little gift for you as a token of our appreciation [JO – PRESENT]

So a toast, “TO MUM AND DAD”

TOAST BEST MAN

[TURN TO BRENDAN]

Bren… Most of you won't know my best man Brendan.  We became friends at uni back in ’99 after I got hit by an automated car park barrier.  We don't meet up very often but when we do its just like the good old days.  I'd like to thank him for being a great friend over the years, organizing an excellent stag weekend in Portsmouth and being my best man today.  We have got a gift for you to say thanks. [JO PRESENT]

So a toast, “TO THE BEST MAN”

TOAST OTHERS

Thanks also go to… Our great ushers, my brother Ant and Jos brother Chris.  You've done a great job making sure the right bums were on the right seats.  We've got a little present for you both. [JO – PRESENT] Kelly and Kate for the readings, they were great.  I know standing up in front of everyone isn't an easy thing to do! We've a little present [JO – PRESENT] To our flower girls, our two wonderful god-daughters, the two Aimees, who both look beautiful today and our page boys, our nephew Dylan and best boy Jack, looking extremely smart in their suits.  We've got presents for you too. [JO – PRESENT]

The list of people to thank is literally endless but I want to sit down…

TOAST JO

…so onto the star of the show, Jo.  I hope that this speech isn't getting overly long but if you will indulge me a little longer I will tell you how we first met…

We met at my first IVC meet at the Bakers Arms pub in Basingstoke back in 2007.  Having been pestered to join by you know who [POINT TO MUM AND DAD], I turned up to meet them in the upstairs bar.  I collected a pint on the way and headed upstairs – and was met with a bunch of people and some food.  Pleasantly surprised, I went for my no.1 priority – my stomach – and joined the food queue.  I thought to myself: ‘I will have to come again’.  While I tucked into my second plate, hovering near the food table I happened to quip to a nearby lass as she made her selections, that their social club was great.   “Club?” she replied, looking a little perplexed.   “Yeah, IVC” I replied, chomping merrily on a sausage roll.   “This isn't a club – this is a private party”.   Needless to say I dropped my smile, my plate of food and backpedalled out of there.  After retiring to the downstairs bar, I casually pretended to watch football (which I don't even like) as I wondered whether just to go home after making a tit of myself, while keeping a wary eye on the stairs for any disgruntled party-goers.   Cutting a long story short, I took a punt on the two tables they might be sitting at and I was right – and Jo was there.  I don't think that she spoke to me that first night, but its probably just as well.  That pretty much set the scene for the next 7 years – Jo soon realised there was never going to be a dull moment with me around! To say we have had a “few” comedy moments, is an understatement…and thats without even talking about my “legendary” DIY skills….

[TURN TO JO] In all seriousness though Jo, thank you for marrying me – I am officially the happiest man in the world.  I thought I had prepared myself quite well today, but nothing could have prepared me for when I saw you walk down the aisle.  You look absolutely stunning, but then you look stunning to me every day.  I love you because you know and understand me like no-one else could, because you believe in my dreams and care about my feelings, and because you make me laugh so hard and smile so often.  I am devoted to you and I love you with all my heart. People do say that today will be the happiest day of our lives (which kind of suggests it is downhill from here) but with you I know that every day will be just as happy as this one.  So, ladies and gentlemen, please be upstanding for the most important toast of all…TO MY WIFE JO.

HANDOVER TO BEST MAN

With some relief, its now time for me to pass you over to my best man. Now, normally at this point, the groom would say that the best man had a fanciful imagination and that you should humour him while he gives his speech, but not today.  What he says in his speech is probably all true…not that I'll be listening. [TAKE OUT HEARING AIDS].  Over to you Bren! 🙂