Speech by Chris Johnson

Speech Type: Groom
Speech Creator: Chris Johnson
Speech Date: mar 2003
Groom's Speech 29/03/2003 (Delivered by Chris Johnson)

As I stand and pontificate for a living and for much of my recreation time too, I have no intention of doing it for too long now…..That is unless you can have a quick whip-round to raise my usual fee. There are, however, a few people that simply cannot go unmentioned

First of all, I'd like to thank you all for coming, especially those of you who have had to travel a long way to get here. It's great to think that you consider us worth the journey and it's lovely to see some faces here that we've not seen in way too many years.

I'd like to thank the caterers, but unfortunately, we couldn't afford any….so a big thankyou goes to Aunty Nett (I think you must be my aunty as well now) who has done such a sterling job with the preparation of the food and has given up so much of her time to it's creation. It looks fantastic, it tastes even better and after this, I'm sure that neither of us will need to eat anything else until we get back from the honeymoon.

Ann – who has made the dresses for Babs and the bridesmaids. I'm sure we'll all agree that they look lovely and have gone a long way to making this the special day that it has turned out to be. Again a lot of time, skill and dedication has gone into their creation – I only wish I could show you all the one that she made for me, but that's just for Friday nights.

Rachael and Chloe, you look lovely and you've done us proud. I'm not sure that Babs would have managed without all your help and support. Thanks.

Stephen, I don't see you, or indeed speak to you nearly as often as I should, but when all's said and done, you're my oldest buddy in the world. Thanks for doing the honours and lets not wait for exceptional circumstances before we meet up next time.

Of course, none of this would have been possible without our parents, who have supported us through not only the preparations, but also through our lives up to this point (and we have no intention of letting it stop here).

Mum, you've been an absolute star form the moment you brought me into the world. But trying to but this much appreciation into words is somewhat akin to a juggler with no arms………absolutely bloody useless. So just thank you.

Ann and Jeff. You've done a grand job here with Babs. You've not just brought up and nurtured a wonderful woman, but you've also provided me with my best friend…thank you. You have my word that from this point on, I'll do my level best to make sure that she'll look after me properly.

And that's it. I'm married…….Who'd have thought it eh?
Least of all me..… they told me that we were going to the theatre this morning. While I was waiting, I thought that I knew an unusual number of people in the audience. Still I think it's all worked out for the best.

A good many single guys that I know have asked me why it is that I'm finally getting married and giving up my carefree single lifestyle. They see it as a simple loss of my freedom. But if you speak to anyone who really knows Babs, they'll tell you that it's so much more than that – In fact, many of them would tell you that they've actually lost sleep wondering how I'm going to manage., but in truth, the answer's a very simple one.

In the seven and something years that Babs and I have been together, we've been through quite a lot. We've had great times, good times, bad times, really bad times and worse still, those incredibly dull in between times when you just want to chew your own leg off with boredom. We've moved house an average of once a year, changed jobs more frequently than we have changed our clothes (or certainly more often than she has) and moved from place to place always swearing never to end up back in Scarborough, but somehow always managing it. Most notably, we spent one of those years living together in the back of van in Australia, which would test anyone's relationship to the limit. But through all these things, we have only become stronger.

There comes a point in every man's life when he decides that it's time to cast off the absurdities of childhood and to settle down. To get on with doing the day to day stuff that everyone else seems to be getting on with so comfortably. Holding down a steady job, buying a house,, and raising a family of his own. Taking out a pension plan, entering into credit agreements, making a five year plan….and sticking to it, cleaning the car on Sunday afternoons, going out to pay for the car on Monday mornings, settling into a routine of wake, work sleep, only stopping to see half an hour of Emerdale (if your lucky) and doing everything in moderation. Considering it a real treat to have a meal out or to pop to the pub for a swifty, silently seething about anyone who makes a noise (particularly laughter) when your trying to sleep because you've got to be up for work in the morning and wondering what would have happened if.…

When that day comes, perhaps we'll throw another party, but for now, I'm marrying Babs purely and simply because I love her and because I can't think of anyone else that I would want to share my adventures with.

And we'll certainly be heading off for a lot more of those before we throw the next shindig.

Again thanks for coming.

But before I hand you over to Stephen, I want to leave you with one last thought. At the end of the afternoon, when all the festivities are over, you'll all start to wind your way home or to wherever you happen to be staying tonight. What I want you all to remember is this……… Whilst, the wedding has finished and the celebrations have ended, for Babs and myself, this is only the beginning, so if anyone fancies joining us for a night out in the hoy in Scarborough, we'll be in the hotel bar at 6.30. Join us, and we'll show you all the sights of Scarborough's seedy underbelly. You're al welcome, and it would be great to see you.