Speech by Jamie K

Speech Type: Groom
Speech Creator: Jamie K
Speech Date: 02/07/2014 16:33:27

Good Afternoon Everyone, hope your having a good time. As you all know I don't like being centre of attention…….but I ll give it a go…!!!

I would like to thank my brand new, shiny, just out of the box father in law, Pete, for all his kind words and good wishes.

Ladies and gentlemen, on behalf of my wife and I, we would like to thank all of you for coming today and helping us make this day so special.

We know that some of you have travelled a long way, we have people here today who have travelled from Aldershot, Spain & Australia & we are genuinely grateful that you are here and able to celebrate our marriage in the company of so many friends and family.  

On that note there are a number of people who we both would have liked dearly to be here who cannot be here or who are no longer with us.

Sadly at the start of the year we lost our Breeze….he was a great dog & loved by all & at 18years old he had a good innings. On a positive note we welcomed the new member of the Keenan family which was Eric the Whippet. He send's his apologies that he couldn't make it today but he has too many bums to sniff.

So if you could raise your glasses to absent family & friends.

Both my wife and I (sounds weird that, I sound grown up now) would like to thank both our parents for all of the help and support they have given us in planning and making today happen.

I would like to thanks Lauren & Vanessa personally for all their hardwork in creating all the invites, scrolls, table plan etc etc.… We cant…..well I cant thank you enough as I would have been useless at it with my limited patience.

On a more personal level, I would like to thank Lauren's mum and dad, Vanessa & Pete, for bringing Lauren up to be the beautiful, warm, loving person I have married today. (Who's wrote this, have you wrote this – look at Lauren)

I'd like to thank them for welcoming me into their family & treating me like a second son. I would like to thank Vanessa for her lovely cooking & also for Lauren's dismay at always letting me choose what I wanted for my tea.

I would like to thank Peter….for always having the fridge full of beer….which I drank….always being available to do my DIY because I'm useless, & introducing me to Real Ale.

Also a thanks to Lauren's brother Neil. We don't see him much as he is never in….but when he is, he's a great taxi service!!!!

To my parents, Id like to say thank you for all of the love and support you have given me over the years. It was a tough start for me….basin haircut, horizontal front teeth, asthma, hayfever, bad eyes & anything else you could think of but we got through it & as you can see turned into a 9 out of 10.… You have always believed in me & pushed me to my goals in being a hard worker, honest, reliable & a good catch….(smile)

As a token of our love & appreciation, would our mothers please accept these flowers…

And I would like to propose a toast, so ladies and gentlemen please stand and raise your glasses, to THE PARENTS!

To the Bridesmaids, Jenny, Louise, Kerry & Caitlin. Thanks for all your help & in looking beautiful today especially our lickle Cakelin. We have given the ladies their gifts this morning which they are wearing in their ears & on their wrists.… So thanks again from Lauren & I.

Not only do the Bridesmaids get presents but they also get a toast. So ladies and gentlemen will you please stand again and raise your glasses.… to THE BRIDESMAIDS

To the ushers, Pauly, Simon, David and Greg. Thanks for all you help organising this episode of Jeremy Kyle (point to crowd) We also gave the boys their gifts this morning which they have on their feet, personalised cuff links, bottle of spirits & all our thanks from Lauren & I.

We would also like to thank Rachel personally who has travelled from Australia for the lovely reading in church. C'mon Rachel give us all a wave…..

Phil the best man, thanks for organising a quality stag do, its not easy controlling 40 roustabouts but a good time was had by all. Thanks for being there for me over the years, even if it was me coming on dates with you & Tammy & all the scuffles you had because of me.

I like to think from a young age I stressed the hair off his head…but that's probably true. I would just like to say no pressure but I'm expecting big things with your speech.

I would like to thank the restaurant for putting this wonderful day on. I'd like to thank Antonio, chef & the team for a wonderful service & unbelievably it's their first wedding.

We have been coming to here for several years & the food has always been fantastic & every person we have brought for a meal has always come back again so please come back as without your support they wouldn't be able to keep this place running & developing students in catering & hospitality with hands on experience. £14.95 on a Sunday for 3 courses…..Bargain. (Do I get my £50 promotional fee now Antonio??)

Now for the serious part…

Well what can I say…how beautiful Lauren looked today, made me very proud. She has had her moments in the preparation to the wedding but that is the norm & maybe my laid back persona didn't help at times. Actually with the stresses & strains Lauren has been very calm & has been calling me Groomzilla……I don't do stress…

We met on the 20th September 2009 in the Litten Tree now known at Yates’. I actually didn't ask Lauren out personally as I'm a S.H.I.T house & was too nervous. Luckily Sandra was nearby to march over to the booth Lauren & her friends were sat in & asked her out. Lauren asked who is asking & was pointed over to the man in the multi coloured tracksuit top….(I loved that top).

It wasn't a simple as asking Lauren out as I had in these words said to Lauren on our first date ‘I've been watching you for 5 years now’ but luckily she laughed this off & the rest was history.

Some of you will be wondering why the top table is the Michael Owen table as he has never been my favourite player & he is a scouser (sorry Claire)……..but on that fateful day on the 20th September 2009 we were all in the Litten Tree watching the United v City match which we won 4-3 due to a last minute goal from Owen.

In the delirium of the moment & several pints of Lager I had plucked enough courage to ask…..someone else to ask Lauren out which luckily she accepted.

Lauren didn't stay long in the pub & scarpered off with her m8’s to another venue. There was time though for me to get grilled off Suzanna & Jenny who where both bleary eyed. Suzanna's first words were ‘I like you're teeth, Jenny look at his teeth’.

I asked what does Lauren like, so I had the heads up before for our first date. They said she likes Lasagne & Horses. I should have known then Lauren was a lady of expensive tastes.

In the panic of asking Lauren out for some reason I asked Lauren to go for an Italian meal. Wish we'd just gone for a drink cost me bloody £60…

So if it wasn't for the Michael Owen goal we wouldn't be sat here today & I'd be £60 better off….

We work well together, I'm the loud one & Lauren is the quiet one. I like to call her the conversation ender though. I will ask how was your day?….fine. What did you have for lunch?…..wrap, how are you today?….ok, WHAT ABOUT MEEEEEEEE…

We have lived together now for 3 years, half in my apartment & half in the house we now share. I loved my apartment as it only took 7minutes to clean & overlooked the pub but we decided it was time to move to a house.

We would like to thank Ben & Jenny who were our next door neighbours in the apartments for pointing out our new house which is actually just around the corner from them. I'm guessing they like us Lauren…….

Lauren is a very independent woman & knows what she wants in life. We share all the jobs in the house, if Lauren works lates, I cook & if Lauren finishes early she will cook & as long as Lauren cleans the bathroom I'm happy to do the rest.

As I've told Lauren as long as I have a bit of money for a few pints on a Thursday night & Sunday afternoon I'm a happy bunny.

I am so happy that you agreed to spend the rest of your life with me, I can't wait for the next chapter of our lives together.

So, before I hand over to Philip I'd like to ask you to stand and raise you glasses one more time to my wife LAUREN.