Speech by Mark Bates

Speech Type: Groom
Speech Creator: Mark Bates
Speech Date: Aug2007
I have a confession to make I cheated a bit with this speech.… I looked on the internet to see if I could get any ideas but I got a bit sidetracked so the bad news is that it might be a rubbish speech but the good news is that my horse racing tips for today are Texas Gold in the 3.30 at Goodwood and Compton Court in the 4.05 at Sandown ….but only if the going is good to firm.

So then I decided to buy a speech off the shelf which begins …Thank you Dave for those kind words/ words of wisdom/ words of warning / words of encouragement .… Delete as applicable.

I have got one or two other thankyous.

First of all thank you all for coming and for your lovely gifts.

Thank you to Lucy and Ruth for being the witnesses ….lots of people thought that I would never ever get married so I will refer them to you if they need confirmation that it really did happen.

Thankyou to Marcia for her reading at the registry office.

Thankyou To Gail for making the cake which I think you will agree is excellent.

Thankyou To Jon for taking the photos.

Thankyou To Richard for being my best man, although I will wait to hear your speech before I confirm those thanks.

Thankyou To Kay for helping Teresa with her preparations and for the use of your car.

Thankyou To the Concorde for the lovely food.

Thankyou To Ben for being our gorgeous baby boy.

Thankyou To the Big Brother audience for voting Charley out of the Big Brother house.

And thank you to Bobby Stokes for his goal in the 1976 FA Cup Final.

You may have guessed that I could never be described as being extrovert … most people who don't know me very well THINK that I am just a miserable git..… People who know me better … are CERTAIN that I am just a miserable git.

So I am very happy and honoured that Teresa, who looks stunning, and whose personality is outgoing, cheerful, sparkling and exuberant has chosen me to spend the rest of her life with.

Out of the two us Teresa is the talker. In fact we were both recently invited onto the the radio 4 quiz programme Just A Minute where the idea is to talk on a subject for 1 minute , I got disqualified because I could never last for longer for 10 seconds but Teresa also got disqualified because she thought they said talk non stop for half an hour.

For those of you who don't know how we met .… it was through a common interest in Information Technology , when BT Broadband said that their connection speeds were very fast I don't think that either of us realised that we would connect quite so quickly.

We didn't hang around and Teresa moved in with me about 10 days after we met. By day 11 she had moved some of her furniture into the lounge and by day 12 the only thing of mine left in the lounge was the dining table ..… That survived until last Christmas.

Would you believe that when I met Teresa she was living in Portsmouth. So apart from the M275 motorway something else good has come out of that City. Teresa was actually born in Eastleigh and we both supported The Saints from the terraces in the 80s – she did briefly convert to Pompey but I am pleased to say that her rehabilitation is coming along nicely. Some of you already know about the incredible coincidence that Teresa`s grandparents once lived in the same road that we now live in together.

I would like say a little bit about Teresa's family and how welcome they have made me feel. When I was first introduced to them Teresa let me know that its a family tradition to give 3 quick kisses on the lips , I have since managed to negotiate Kath down to just the one peck but Dave is proving to be a bigger hurdle.

I have spent literally minutes telling Kath all about myself but I think she is still not quite sure about me. Some people have spent a life time knowing me but I am still a mystery to them as well. Teresa knows me the best of all and I promise that I will do all I can to make her happy.

So finally, once again thank you all for coming, I hope you have enjoyed the day , if you would like to come back to our house for a knees up afterwards then you `re all very welcome.

Thank you.