Speech by Mark Lawton

Speech Type: Groom
Speech Creator: Mark Lawton
Speech Date: Mar2005
Introduction
Ladies and Gentlemen, this day is a historic day for me. On the 7th May Samantha and I had been going out with each other for 10 years which will make major anniversaries easy! I'm sure there are plenty amongst you who thought it may never happen, but I am very happy to be here, even if the nerves have now finally kicked in!

Thank you – All
So on behalf on my wife and I. We would like thank you all for coming here today and sharing our special day with us. We had considered getting married abroad, but we decided we would prefer to share our day with all of you. And I'm glad we did.

We would also like to thank you all very much for your cards, kind thoughts and wonderful presents. If I told you that we chose and confirmed the entire wedding list in less than 3 hours, most of you will understand the required effort to persuade Samantha that we didn't really need the entire shop, and drag her round the store!

Thank You – John
John, thank you for those kind words, I'm really looking forward to being an official part of the family and I am proud to be your son-in-law. I just hope I can live up to your expectations and I'm looking forward to my training in “D.I.Y and the 10 year plan”. Having known Samantha since I was 24 – I think I know what I am getting myself into.
Thank you – Samantha
I must thank John, Carol, Hilary and Reg for bringing up such a lovely daughter, but due to the number of phone calls between Samantha and her mother, BT and Orange have also asked me to send their congratulations!
I know much effort Samantha put into designing her own dress she is very particular and how many miles were spent flying up and down to Devon, but that didn't prepare me for seeing her walk up the aisle. I think you'll all agree how beautiful she looks today.
So, to the new Mrs Lawton – my beautiful, intelligent, charming, caring hang on Samantha – what does this say – oh, wife! – Thank you for everything you have done. You know everything about me and love me just the same. I am extremely lucky to be the one to marry you – and I hope this is the start of many happy years together however I have to tell you all -one little story about my blushing bride!
It goes back to when we first moved into Bridge Cottage ….…
Basically we hired a van, but as I had been banned for speeding some years previously – none of the van hire companies would insure me to drive the van – so Samantha had to drive. Due to the sheer quantity of clothes and shoes that Samantha possesses – I roped Adam the biggest of my two ushers – Adam, where are you in to help ……
The collection of all Samantha things from her house went without a hitch it was mostly clothes and shoes and we unloaded everything in record time. When we got to my parents, however, it was a major logistical exercise as I had sofas, desks, wardrobes, sofas, clothes and hi-fi to pack in. Needless to say the van was now packed completely to the brim and gently set off on the winding roads to the M40, we increased speed due to the stability of the van in a straight line. In fact once we came down the dual carriageway from High Wycombe, Adam Samantha and I were all talking ten to the dozen hard to believe, I know. We were now cruising at about 90mph, when the downhill slip road loomed and we turned off. Now as you can probably imagine, a 2 ton van with about 2 tons of weight carries a lot of momentum, and although Samantha had lifted off the accelerator, the van wasn't slowing down!
At 100 metres out we are still doing nearly 80mph! Suddenly there's a thump as Adam's size 13 boot hits the carpeted floor and he is normally the last of the late brakers, and Samantha started to brake still chatting away. Now the roundabout is looming ahead of us and even I am getting nervous! My foot hits the floor and I shout “brake”. Samantha hits the pedal for all she is worth and the van starts shuddering, the brakes groaning with the stress suddenly applied to them and we screech to a halt on the roundabout nothing was coming by the way. Adam and I both turn to look incredulously at Samantha – who says “What? I can't talk and brake at the same time”!
We OK, Samantha has now been planning this wedding for 18 months, and at times it has seemed like a lifetime since I asked her to marry me. It has been slightly more difficult over the past few months as we knitted everything together – but so far everything seems to have gone according to plan!

Parents
We would like to thank all the parents as we wouldn't be here today if it wasn't for them.
We would like to thank them for the love and support over the years and for all the advice you have given us.
For putting up with us and pointing us back in the right direction.
Thank you for all the help with today's preparations – the flowers, favours, finances – the list is endless! We could not done it without you!
So as a thank you to all the mothers – we have a small gift for you.
Gifts to Hand out.
Best Man
Thank you – Daniel – I would like to thank Michael for agreeing to be my Best Man. Although the trouble with being the Best man at a wedding is that you never get to prove it.
Daniel was delighted at first, but I think the reality suddenly dawned on him that he didn't have much experience of weddings – lets alone what was required of the Best Man. However as soon as it came to finding strip clubs in London we discovered he seemed strangely well informed! Daniel as a little token of my esteem – we have a little something for you.
PRESENT
Thank you – Ushers
Mel and I would also like to thank Matthew and Adam being ushers today, and doing such a splendid job of helping everyone find their way, although our wedding organiser, Warwick, hadn't realised that we would be having security on the door!
PRESENT
Thank you – Bridesmaids
A final and big thank you goes to our bridesmaids, Julie, Alice, Megan and Lauren. We would like to say how lovely they all look and thank them all for doing such a wonderful job today. Special thanks go to Julie, who is also half of our personal training team who has put so much effort into ensuring that mine and Samantha's fitness is as goods as it is – even if sometimes she is a bit of a witch ……We have a small gift as a token of our thanks and as a memento of this lovely day. PRESENTS
Ladies and Gentlemen, please be upstanding. I would like to propose a toast … to the bridesmaids.
Now I'm not going to stand here and give you a load of stale old jokes, I'm going to leave that to the best man. Thank you.