Speech by Paul

Speech Type: Groom
Speech Creator: Paul
Speech Date: 11/06/2014 08:28:56

Thanks Iain for your kind words, your help and support in arranging today and most importantly ensuring Keri made it to the church. 

If truth be told I was rather nervous about today, the dreaded public display of affection, everyone witnessing my sober-ish dancing and making a speech in front of you all. 

In trying to alleviate my concerns about this speech an un-named individual told me ‘after today you won't be allowed to speak in public again without being interrupted or corrected so enjoy it’ – thanks for that advice (Best Man).

Please can you make sure you have a drink to hand as there will be a few toasts and xxxxx, when I say toast that doesn't mean down in one!

Introduction thanking guests

On behalf of my wife and I……, we would like to thank everyone for coming today.  It's lovely to see so many of our family and firiends here to celebrate the happiest day of our lives.  It certainly wouldn't be the same without you all.  Special thanks to (insert people who have travelled), it really means a lot to us both.

We'd like to thank you all for your kind wishes, cards, gifts and support, they are very much appreciated, especially the cheques as I will be using my Accounting knowledge, your account details and signatures to set up all our direct debits on your account. 

Everyone has been very generous and we are both looking forward to our honeymoon.

There are people who would like to be here today, however for various reasons cannot be and I am sure they are all thinking of us.  So, with them in mind, would you please, raise your glasses, and join me in a toast to absent family & friends. – TO ABSENT FAMILY AND FRIENDS

Iain and Pam, you've done an excellent job raising such a wonderful daughter, provider her with so much love and support over the years.  I hope today does not feel like you losing your daughter, more gained a son to cook and clean up after.

Being protective of her daughter, Keri's mum was very wary of me when I first met her.  There is an interesting story of how Pam and I first met and it's one I may share at the bar later.

Given I was viewed with a degree of suspicion when I first met Keri's mum, you can imagine how nervous I was when I first met Keri's dad, who at the time was a serving police officer.  Luckily the exploits of my youth didn't result in any charges being pressed and with Keri giving the correct answers to questions about me I was willingly allowed in their house! 

Over the past nine years Pam and Iain have done so much to make me welcome to their family, from their highly unique birthday cake celebrations and insisting I join in on family quizzes.  They are both fantastic in laws to have and I promise to do all I can to take care of your daughter.  

Likewise I'd like to thank my parents for doing an excellent job raising me. 

I have a lot to thanks my parents for.  Thanks for welcoming Keri into our family and for supporting me over the past 28 years.  My parents showed me the value of hard work, unfortunately I ignored this through my teen years, but I did become very good at Championship Manager.

Thanks for everything you have done for Keri and me, you've always been there when I've needed something and I can't count the number of times you have gone out of your way to help us. 

Also thanks to both Keri's and my parents for their very generous contributions towards today. 

(Special thanks – thank wedding venue, anyone reading, grace etc).

Now there is an unwritten rule of wedding etiquette that states no-one should look as beautiful as the bride or as handsome as the groom, and I'd like to thank our ushers, for sticking to that rule to the letter.

They done an excellent job especially the way they carried out the security checks on the way into church with such distinction.  There wasn't an abandoned rucksack in sight.

I'd also like to say thanks to my best man Danny, for keeping me relatively calm this morning and reassuring me Keri would turn up. He has been a great friend over the years, however if I'm being honest I did worry about his best man credentials when he booked us on a dry train for my stag (which is really impressive given there is only one dry train to Newcastle a week from Aberdeen)… however he did a great job.  Everyone made it home, albeit just, and had a great time as the photographic evidence on Facebook will testify. 

It's been an amazing day so far and anyone who has got married will know the significant amount of time, effort and work is involved in the preparation.  Like most men I did not foresee this this.  Thankfully we have had a number of wonderful people on hand to help and none more so than our bridesmaid.  I'm sure everyone will agree that you look beautiful today.  Thank-you for providing support to Keri in the build-up to today, for the hen-do's and for always being there for Keri as a loving sister.  Would you please, raise your glasses, and join me in a toast to our bridesmaid

Bit about Keri

Now onto my gorgeous new wife. Keri – you look absolutely stunning today.

Some of you might be wondering how today came to be.   Keri and I first met at secondary school however it wasn't until a chance encounter in an un-named trashy nightclub during Fresher's week of 2004 that I plucked up enough courage to speak to Keri.

Luckily Keri had drunk about as much as I had that evening which is probably why she agreed to give me her number.  After over a month of pretending she wasn't really that interested she gave in and here we are.  Back then, I never could have wished that nine years later here today I would be standing in front of you all.

Keri has been amazing for me, putting up with my strange ways, she is my best friend and someone I can always talk to, if she'd actually listen to me as well, well it would be even better.  We complement each other very well, she gives me orders and I take them.

When trying to write down all Keri's good points I genuinely did struggle,             and I mean this in a good way, as there are so many.  She is beautiful, kind, caring and considerate and is looking amazing today; I'm looking forward to spending the rest of my life with you.  

So Ladies and Gentlemen, please be upstanding, for the most important toast I'm ever likely to make, TO MY WIFE —- TO KERI

Handover to Best Man

Before I pass you on to my best man I feel I should make you aware that although you may not realise, Danny unfortunately suffers from a rare medical condition that makes him prone to exaggeration.  It also makes him believe that fanciful events in his head actually really did occur, however I can assure you they did not.  As I said earlier, he is a true friend and I wouldn't want you to go upsetting him, so if you could bear with him, even perhaps join with him on his journey of make believe, I'd really appreciate it – cheers.