Speech by Stephen Adshead

Speech Type: Groom
Speech Creator: Stephen Adshead
Speech Date: Jul2004
Ladies and Gentlemen, This may well be the very first and very last time that Michelle is going to let me speak on behalf of both of us. It is a privilege and an honour to do so.

Although I realise that public speaking is a waste of valuable drinking time, despite being a quiet, shy man of very few words, there are quite a few thank-you's to make, so if you were wanting to go to the toilet, cross your legs!

Firstly I would like to thank Steve for those kind words and thank you all for coming here today to share our special day, It means a great deal to us both that you were all able to make it and we hope you are all having a good time.

Michelle and her bridal magazines have been planning this wedding for a while now, and it goes without saying that I've obviously had an ogle at the pretty ladies inside. But I'd just like to say that none of them compare to how beautiful Michelle looks today.

Michelle… my wife! I would like to thank you for the wonderful person that you are and for the last nine and a half years we have spent together.

I have to say I was overwhelmed when Michelle walked through those doors today, and I would like everyone to know how happy I am that Michelle has agreed to be my wife.

She is beautiful, intelligent, charming… the list is endless but unfortunately I can't read the rest of her writing!!

Michelle, thank you for marrying me and making me very, very happy. I love you and I hope today is the happiest day of your life… as it is mine.

A huge thank-you goes to both sets of parents as we wouldn't be here today if it wasn't for them… Neither would you for that matter, as we wouldn't have been able to afford to feed you.

I have to thank both Steve and Sue for bringing up such a beautiful and intelligent daughter… I'll leave you to argue over which trait comes from who.
I genuinely do feel like a member of your family already and not being one for too much emotion I have never actually gotten around to saying a proper thanks. So thank you for accepting me into your family.

To my Mum and Dad – Jean and David. I'd like also to say thank you, for all off your help and support over my 24 years I know I wasn't the easiest of children to bring up. I am sure Simon will fill the rest of you in on that later.

I would also like to point out that despite me trying I never did ‘have anyone's eye out’, ‘get square eyes from watching too much tele’ and contrary to popular opinion I don't look like this cos ‘the wind blew’ whilst I was pulling a face as a child.

Michelle and I would like to thank both sets of parents for their love and support over the years and especially the last twelve months, which have been hectic to say the least.

Both our parents have been married for a number of years and are great role models for me and Michelle to follow, we can only hope our marriage is as long and successful as theirs have been.

So as a thank you to both sets of parents we have a small gift as a token of our appreciation.

The Ushers… Michelle and I would like to thank Shane, Ryan and Ross for being utterly brilliant today… and at the same time apologise to any one who was directed to the wrong seat.

Seriously lads you did a brilliant job today and we have brought you each a present to say thank you.

Our thanks to Matt and Simon my ‘best men’.

I realise that it is traditional to only have one best man but im afraid the choice was far too difficult as they are both such top blokes.

Also we figured if we gave them a ring each before the wedding we had a better chance of there being a ring when Michelle got to the alter.

Matthew and I have been best buddies since the age of Six and has been easily the most excitable person since we announced our plans to get married and Simon is my ‘big brother’ who's organisational skills are second to none.

They worked to terrific effect on My Stag Weekend in Amsterdam… sorry Barcelona… I mean Amsterlona (Cough!). I would love to tell you all more about that but I swore an oath.

I know that they have both been extremely nervous about their speech, but to reassure you:

I've seen you make fools of yourselves in front of a crowd on many night's out, so just imagine your in the pub… but the kind of pub where you keep your trousers ON.

Both of them are terrific blokes who have been absolutely massive friends to me for many years now and for that I thank them both.

We also have a small gift for you both to say thanks.

And finally, the bridesmaids… I would like to say how lovely the bridesmaids look and thank them all for doing such a wonderful job today and for all your efforts with the hen night! It's not easy shopping with Michelle and my thanks go to you both for sharing that burden with me during the run up to today.

Again we have a small gift for you both as a token of our appreciation.

And so I would like to propose a toast, to the bridesmaids!

Just before I hand you over to my best men… I would like to add that whatever it is they have come up with for their speech, I categorically deny.

My lawyers are on standby to commence legal proceedings. And if that doesn't scare them, the thought of Michelle's chasing them down Cartergate ought to do the trick.

Once again we would like to thank you all for coming here today and for all the wonderful gifts that we have received. I hope to see you all on the dance floor shortly.